July 02, 2005
Types of astrologers – part 2 - Final!
‘Print out’ astrologers
In my previous blog I missed to add this important kind of astrologers who are budding really fast. These are people who invest in a computer, download the latest astrology software from the net, find the crack code and then start calling themselves astrologers.
Millions of astro rules are fed in the software and on the basis of few astro parameters pages & pages of predictions are thrown by the computers. Whether the prediction will suit you specifically is a BIG question!
It is like this – you have a head ache, and there would be some 100 permutations & combinations for why you have the pain. You feed in all the permutations in your computer, and the computer will throw the possible remedy for the same. In that case you will never need a doctor!
Or probably you play the mantra ‘Om Namo Narayanaya’ in mp3 format on your computer and put it in loop for millions of repetition. In that case Lord Narayanaya should bless the computer with few siddhies!
Computers can never replace human beings as far as divinity is concerned!
Astrologers who counsel
These astrologers are psychological pillows. Whatever your vows be, you can have an appointment with the astrologer and vomit all that you have on your mind on him/her.
They will happily listen to you, and give you one standard answer – shaant raho, sab kuch theek ho jaayega (be patient, everything will be alright). I really wonder how can one remain patient when his/her marriage is heading for a divorce?!
The clients feel better after the cleanliness process, go home happy, and return after 3 months with a fresh set of problems.
Astrology is not a soothe saying business where the clients are made to feel better, but it is about predicting - no matter what the client thinks or feels. End of the day it should be truth that was told.
Astrologers who claim to solve problems & change destiny
Add an extra letter ‘h’ in your name, and all your problems will be solved. Or probably wear a ring that has 2 carat of Emerald on it, and you will win over destiny.
Plenty of astrologers come on TV to convince the audience about how easily karma can be put to an end and how future can be structured or planned by human efforts. If only Siddharth’s father could put an extra ‘S’ in his name and stopped him from becoming the biggest saint of all times – Gautam Buddha! (The future of Guatam Buddha was predicted by an astrologer when Siddharth was born.)
People of course love to go in for this kind of astrologers who promise to change your destiny, since none is happy with his/her own life. Have we ever liked the dish on our table more interesting than which is on our friend’s table?
Finally the Astrologers who predict & leave it there
In my personal experience of meeting with astrologers from across India, I have come across very few astrologers, who could predict on the dot with utmost clarity & perfection. K Gopalakrishnan (my teacher), Dr Praja Rao, and the one who I met outside the Chennai‘s Sai Baba temple are few of the best astrologers I have encountered.
These astrologers won’t give you gyaan, won’t bombard you with useless information, won’t give you false hopes, and also won’t promise you of changing your destiny.
They will just do a reporting job, and honestly let you know about what is in store for you – no matter how bad you feel about it. They are one of the few astrologers who take the risk of predicting your future.
And to which category of astrologers I belong – I don’t want to write about myself! My clients would decide that :).
Posted by Kenni at 08:27 AM | Comments (0)
July 01, 2005
Types of astrologers – part 1!
If Jesus Christ visits the planet today, he will be surprised to see the different branches of Christianity that resulted out of his divine preaching - Roman Catholics, Protestants, Penda Coastal, CSI, NSI, Christian Orthodox & what not. I am sure there also would be a special cult, which will object Jesus Christ being a Christian himself! It is simply the ignorance of the masses, which without understanding the basics jump on creating their own belief system & their own preconceived notions. Astrology is one such art that has been conceived utterly wrong based on very few astrologers who most of the times have gone wrong.
Scientific astrologers
Astrologers who refuse to accept astrology as a divine art choose this path – where in they try really hard giving all the scientific explanation for the planetary placements and their influence on life events. How much ever they try, they ultimately fail to convince the scientific minds.
Modern crowd of course prefers a scientific astrologer for astrological consultation – as they don’t want to get tagged as a believer of blind faith.
Scientific astrologers are always very keen on getting the exact date & time of birth for charting the horoscope, and they also give a lot of importance to minor degrees of planets.
They usually won’t predict events, but prefer to give you a list of probabilities that might occur in your life. The failure rates for a scientific astrologer are really low – as they have predicted nothing.
For instance – the astrologer would say, the time is good hence if you put effort you will be successful. If you go back after a month saying nothing has materialized – he would very well escape saying you didn’t put enough effort hence the event didn’t occur. Safe batting I should say.
Western astrologers
Western Astrologer Linda Goodman with her experience with different people could segregate all human under 12 signs based on their date of birth. And she chose to give the same ‘images’ to all the Sun Signs she discovered, as that of Moon signs Indians had invented 5000 years ago.
She kept publishing books which spoke more about characteristics & nature of a person belonging to a particular sign. Where has the ‘prediction’ part gone? She didn’t bother, since none of her readers bothered.
Whatever is Western has great value in India – even if it is a truck load of shit like Harry Potter & the Sorceror’s Stone.
People who happen to read Linda Goodman & mug it up call themselves astrologers too. They are adept at character analysis, and might shock you with their perfection at reading your behaviors. They play it safe too – they never touch the prediction part.
Astrologers who give only gyaan
Thanks to B V Raman & K N Rao to have made astrology understandable by common man by publishing the highest number of books on Indian astrology. I am sure very few know about these two icons – in fact both of them are termed as fathers of Indian Vedic Astrology.
B V Raman was ‘THE’ man to have translated most of Sanskrit scriptures of astrology into English. The scriptures otherwise belonged to a particular caste or community.
K N Rao is the person who founded a separate institute for Indian astrology in Delhi, and is the single man behind winning the case from Supreme Court to add astrology as a subject in universities.
People out of special interest read their books, analyze charts, and start calling themselves astrologers. There are few million rules which they apply on individual charts, and try giving the clients some gyaan – which most of the times aren’t understandable.
For instance they would say – You are born in the lagna of Meena, and your Moon sign is Kumbha. In your chart Guru, Mercury & Sun are placed in your lagna itself – which is good, Ketu & Venus go into the 3rd house, which is bad….
Did you understand what these jargons mean? I am sure you didn’t!
To be continued…
*Astrologers who counsel
*Astrologers who claim to solve problems & change destiny
*Finally the Astrologers who predict & leave it there
Posted by Kenni at 06:47 AM | Comments (0)
June 22, 2005
An insight into sleep!
Baby sitting is an art, and making the baby sleep is a bigger art. My wife left for shopping today, and I was swinging my 3-year-old baby in a cradle when I got this idea of blogging about what sleep exactly is. I am sure this blog will help all those men, who cannot escape baby sitting their children - always.
Scientifically the process of sleep is divided into 4 levels - the 1st, the 2nd, the 3rd and the 4th. A good sleep comprises of 4 hours of 1st & 2nd level and 4 hours of 3rd and 4th level.
I am sure this is getting a bit confusing. Here is an easier way to understand this concept –
The 1st level of sleep
This is when you decide to close your eyes, and try to sleep. Various thoughts come to your mind – the day to day happenings, the images of people you met, new ideas for the next day at office, women stripping etc. You are so engrossed in yourself that if someone calls you, you take time to revert - consciously.
The 2nd level of sleep
This is an intermediate stage, while you are slowly falling into the 3rd stage. This is a semi-sleep level, when you sometimes can hear the TV volume and sometimes don’t. There is a break in what you hear. Also this is the level when you could hear, but could not understand.
The 3rd level of sleep
This is the level when you start having dreams. This is when your subconscious mind gets activated. You lose consciousness, and most of your muscles are put to rest during this stage. People tend to get up in fear, have wet dreams, or start walking during this stage.
The 4th level of sleep
This is the stage when you are close to death. You don’t have dreams during this level. Your conscious mind, subconscious mind, and all the muscles of the body are completely put to rest. If someone tries to wake you up during this phase, you will pass through the 3rd & 2nd level before getting up.
Most saints sleep only for 4 hours, because they train themselves to jump to the 4th level of sleep directly – this prolongs the life span.
People who tend to worry a lot either become insane or need hallucination (sleeping pills or alcohol) to sleep. This is because their worries don’t allow them to cross the 2nd level of sleep. And how does alcohol help in giving you good sleep? Alcohol helps in breaking thought processes and the person becomes successful in jumping into the 3rd and 4th level.
The next time you booze, try spending some time meditating. You will witness that your mind could not stick to one subject – it will keep breaking your thoughts. Hence, people tend to drink when they have a lot of pressure. It surely helps.
And here is the tip to make your baby sleep fast in a cradle
Playfulness for kids is similar to worries for adults. Kids usually don’t sleep or eat when they are busy playing, and similarly adults don’t eat or sleep well when they have worries/work.
1st stage
Cradle is a device invented to make your babies sleep. Whenever you put your baby in the cradle, it will naturally rebel. Try swinging the cradle vigorously to match the baby’s energy. If the baby cries, try raising your voice – you could sing a song or lullaby. By doing this you are taking your baby to the first level of sleep, where it decides that it should sleep now. If the baby keeps its eyes open, the movement of the cradle will tire the eyes of baby, and the eyelids will close automatically.
2nd stage
Once the baby silence down, slowly reduce the speed of cradle, and keep it constant. Keep singing the song or lullaby, and keep repeating the same song. This will create a kind of boredom in the child, and take her to the 2nd stage of sleep. She will be able hear you – partially.
3rd stage
Now keeping the movement of the cradle constant, gradually reduce your volume. This will slowly help your baby slip into the 3rd stage of sleep, when she starts having dream. Don’t stop swinging the cradle at this juncture. She might get up disturbed any moment.
4th stage
Stop singing, and gradually reduce the speed of swinging. 99 per cent the kid won’t get up, if it does – you need to come from stage one! You can stop swinging slowly, and the kid would have already got on to the 4th stage of sleep.
You can come back, and complete your pending job, which otherwise could get disturbed by your children. I took 1 hour to write this blog, and my kid is still sleeping peacefully.
Posted by Kenni at 07:10 AM | Comments (2)
June 03, 2005
My Newest Products just for ‘YOU’!
Here is the list of new products which I have added to my services. Kindly have a look.
Shani Transit Prediction - Rs 900 ($18 USD)
The planet Shani gets into a Cancer once again after a 4 month retrograde period in Gemini. It will remain in the new house till November 2006. This particular phenomenon is bound to bring major changes in human lives starting from May, June & July 2005.
The changes could be in the areas related to career, marriage, foreign trips, or purchase of house/vehicles depending on individual horoscope. Get a detailed report by mail on how this astrological event can bring changes in your personal life.
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Sexual orgasm is considered to give glimpses of ‘nirvana’ (enlightenment) to an individual. And sex can very well be used to lift your energy spiritually. Here is a unique product where I blend astrology & spirituality to enhance your sexual life. Don’t worry your identity will be kept 100 per cent confidential.
Astro Debates - Rs 300 ($6 USD) per 15 minutes live chat on Yahoo! Messenger
You got any doubt about astrology? Or you need some answers related to religion and spirituality? Or are you a sceptic who likes to argue against astrology? Or would you like to call an astrologer a fool or astrology a fake science? Here is an opportunity for you to debate LIVE!
Customised products on Vaastu Shastra, Feng Shui, & remedial measures like Lucky Gem Stones, Nameology, Mantra Shastra et al will be added soon.
If you got any inputs please mail me your ideas to kennedig@yahoo.com
Posted by Kenni at 08:13 AM | Comments (0)
June 01, 2005
What’s life? It’s just a set of memories!
Zen says ‘keep flowing.’ The Buddhists say its nirvana. Osho says it all about no-mind. Jesus says forget & forgive. And there are many others who have dedicated ample number of years to understand what life is all about & who took enough pain to share their experiences about God or Divinity or shunyatha - whatever you name it. End of the day truth remains that there is no escape from day-to-day human problems and that you cannot leave them behind to survive in solitude.
Whether you live in a crowded place like Mumbai, or you escape to the caves of Himalayas once in a while – you would need people to socialise or at least to share your experiences. Ultimately Buddha had to come down to the same town, where he was an emperor, after 12 years of penance to preach the people about Bodhi Satwa.
Once I was typing a letter to someone & by mistake I typed 2104 as the year. And to my surprise I could not see my existence. I could not even see my children’s existence by that period. An important truth flashed in my mind that even in our sub conscious we are aware about our life span, and human mind can not think beyond a point. Of course we can take our imagination a bit forward and think about how the world could be in the year 2200 but then it will be really hard to see yourself enjoying all the amanities. We exist in a particular time frame say between 1975 & 2050, and life is all about how many good & bad memories you gather in that particular time frame.
Goals are important, money is important, career is important, the new house, the new car and the new girl are important. But then no body will remember you for having a bank balance of few crores, or for owning a flat in Marine Drive, or for sleeping with Jennifer Lopez, or for having a chauffer driven car while working with Tatas or Birlas. You will be remembered on the basis of how many good memories you could inculcate in the people you have interacted with or on the basis of the good changes you were able to bring in somebody’s life.
Spending money is the easiest thing. You can either splurge few 100s in a dance bar boozing yourself with the best beer and dancing your way with a bar girl or probably donate a 2 rupee coin for a hungry child who begs under the hot sun near the traffic signal. By donating you of course are supporting beggary, but I think supporting beggary is better than promoting bar girls.
Living a selfish life is easy. Anybody can do that. But living your life to assist humanity is altogether a different ball game. Many talented & successful people have lived & died, but then the one who tops the list of important people in our minds are the people who were able to bring great changes in human lives. They not only collected good memories for themselves but also were successful in implanting great reminiscence in others’ mind.
Posted by Kenni at 05:16 PM | Comments (0)
May 27, 2005
How to know what your ‘goal’ is!
One of the questions I always hated to answer all my life was, ‘what is your aim in life’? Probably I disliked the question because I never knew the answer. In schools I used to tell that I wanted to become an engineer, because my bench mate wanted to become one. Later I kept telling that I wanted to become a doctor, because the teachers admired students who wanted to become a physician. To be honest I never had an aim or a goal. But deep down, I always had an affinity towards saintly people & things that were associated with divinity. I surely could not tell my parents or teachers that I wanted to become a saint!
God always provide you two paths. One is the simple one - where life pushes you and another is a tougher one - where you push the life. You will never come to know about these different paths until you surrender yourself totally to the divine. You would always think that the path you are moving on is the only path God has provided.
The first path is simple. You have a system, you have a hierarchy, you get few promotions, you slog for the company, pay to the government, get retired & live on pension.
The second path is the tougher one. There is no hope, uncertainties haunt you, close people (that includes you wife, parents, relatives, friends & neighbours) criticise you or laugh at you, there is no hierarchy, there is none to guide you, and you never retire. And the truth is most successful men have chosen the second path & not the first!
For instance this person would have died as a mediocre foreign return lawyer, if he had not selected the second path. I am talking about Mahatma Gandhi!
So where is this second path hidden?
Every individual has a purpose in this life, and every one aspires to become big or successful. We live half our life for the society, and we tend to keep compromising on our special interests or passion.
Go into solitude, close your eyes, and focus on the things that give you the most pleasure. It could even be furniture that gives you immense delight. You probably can be a very good carpenter in that case. But then you should have enough guts to answer to your father that you will start making furniture after having completed your MBA from Oxford! If you succeed in taking the plunge, then you surely have chosen the 2nd path.
Don’t focus on what you want in life. Of course everyone wants money, fame & success. These three things are peripheral of your effort & dedication in achieving your personal goal. Focus on what you want to do in life. List down things that give happiness – it could be sex, it could be movies, it could be religion, it could be photography, it could be sketching, or it could be music. After listing it down, ask yourself whether you would leave your job and dedicate your life for your special interest. If the answer is yes, then probably you have taken the 2nd path.
Sex? How can sex give you success? Remember porn movies & porn magazines are multi million businesses in the US, and as far as India is concerned there isn’t one professionally made porn movie or magazine. Don’t jump on conclusions - this was just an example!
If you want to know astrologically what field suits you the best, you can always ask me!!
Posted by Kenni at 08:50 AM | Comments (0)
May 23, 2005
Hey blogger! Planning to write a book?
The concept of blogging has brought many a talents out. The creative people bubbling with ideas, the people who were rejected by media companies and the people who always wanted to write but could not gather enough guts to take up writing as a full time career can find solace in updating their blog site. A 100 dedicated readers is a good amount of number for a successful blogger. With increase in readership & fame most bloggers are now nursing a thought about bringing out their own book or publishing their own work. Will it work?
I always wonder why companies like Pepsi & Coke spend crores in advertising & marketing their products. Why do they make the super stars & the cricketers dance to their funny & bubbly tunes? What is their motto? The simple funda is – their target audience is anyone who has Rs 10 note in his/her pocket. And the whole drama is played to induce them to take that currency out and make him/her drink plain carbonated water which is produced spending a meagre 1 rupee. Making people pay for a service or a product is the most difficult thing on the planet.
However talented you are & however interesting your writing style is - until & unless you get associated with big brands or you have tons of money to pump in you cannot succeed in life. If not money, you at least should have someone BIG who gives you a lift. (Will write another blog about successful people and people behind their success)
I happen to meet a person who is an author of few vernacular books. He was the person who gave me an insight about how the publishing industry works.
There are 2 important things you need to consider before you think about publishing your own book. Firstly – how big you are, and secondly how big the publisher is.
If you are a celebrity writer like Shobha De (remember Shobha De became famous through Indian Express, which already is a big brand), you write your experiences about constipation and you will be paid in lakhs for getting your work published by top publishers.
If you are a layman, and think that your thoughts are unique and will be accepted by general audience then you need to approach big publishers like Penguin or Rupa. If your writing is accepted by them, then you will be paid 7.5 per cent of the book cost. But then in this case your work should really impress the so called intellect working for these publishers.
If you think you don’t need both the options and you want to publish your own book. Then the option is open. You can publish your own book for not more than Rs 50,000. But then even your friends won’t buy it from you.
People visiting your blog & leaving interesting comments doesn’t mean that they cannot survive without reading your work. There are enough takers for shit if it is disbursed for free. If you really want to know where you stand - just introduce a payment gateway on your blog site and start charging Re 1 per blog. If you get 1 customer, then your probably you will win the next Booker’s prize!
End of the conversation I came to know from the author, who published his books that he had to pay the publisher from his pocket to get his work done!
So anyone here who wants to buy my e-book titled ‘How to enhance your sexual life after 5 years of marriage’, can mail me your request to kennedig@yahoo.com. I am pricing it at Rs 200 per copy. Any takers?
Posted by Kenni at 08:46 AM | Comments (0)
May 12, 2005
My Services Just for ‘YOU’
I have revamped my site a bit and my personality to a very large extent. I have pierced both my ears & have started wearing rings, & also I have started growing my hair, beard and all that which has the potential of growing :P. On the site I have introduced few customised astrological products that suit your requirements perfectly. Do go through them, and let me know if you have any innovative ideas that can help me & others.
Posted by Kenni at 07:51 AM | Comments (0)
December 14, 2004
Crack the GMI syndrome!
I hate my irregularity in updating my blogs, and am sure my readers’ hate the same too :P. Not that I am busy nowadays, it is just that I am shuffling between two careers. One as a professional astrologer & second as a consultant to my sister’s Data Conversion Unit. And for the first time in life I feel 24 hours are indeed less in a day…there is so much to do and there is so little time. I have been blogging about ‘How to save your marriage, and this particular blog is the 3rd in the series’ The inputs are out of my own experiences out of my marriage, which will surely help the ones who are already married & warn who haven’t taken the suicidal plunge as yet!
Osho in one of his discourses spoke about how dogs are the best in dealing with situations diplomatically. When a stranger comes to your house, the dog will bark as well as wag its tail. It barks to show the owner that it is carrying out its duty properly & wags his tail to show sign of acceptance ‘IF’ the stranger happens to its owner’s friend. Both ways dog benefits from the situation & succeeds in being a good pet. I am not saying that married men are dogs. But men of course have to learn this trick of diplomacy from dogs.
Women are not that bad as most men perceive them. There are exceptions too. And if you are able to crack the GMI syndrome of any woman – YOU surely CAN WIN.
Now what’s this GMI syndrome? It is ‘Give Me Importance.’ Unlike men, the confidence level of women to a very large extent depends upon lots of external factors - how others see them, how others perceive them, and how much importance people give them for their existence & their decisions. Hence a girl at her prime (17 – 25) has more confidence than a woman who is at her 40 or 45. Men remain the same through out their lives – they keep poking their nose, scratching their scrotum, and farting all around without giving a damn to the people who notice them.
You need to practice Zen philosophy of detachment in dealing with your wives. To practice this you need to do a lot of self talking & game planning. For instance you need to send some money for your mother on Diwali, and you don’t know how your wife will react.
There are many ways you can do this.
1) You send the money and hide it completely from your wife, but then be ready to face the music if you mom calls you on your land line acknowledging the receipt of the money.
2) You tell your wife that you are going to send the money no matter what may come. In this case you need not buy crackers for Diwali at all. There will be enough bursting in the house itself.
3) The third one is by winning over GMI syndrome. Tell your wife that you are not going to send anything to your mom this diwali. She will surely ask you why. Tell her that you don’t have enough money & you don’t feel the necessity. Your wife will surely come to you with some money, move her hand on your hair, give a pat on your back & ask you send some money to your mom.
And you have already won the game! Use the same funda if you want to call up your ex-girl friend, or want to have a beer with your old friend or want to watch a movie alone. Give her some importance, and let her decide what you want her to decide. It works perfectly!
Posted by Kenni at 07:47 AM | Comments (0)
December 11, 2004
How to save your marriage – 1st problem
Any marital relationship is like a blissful fable in the first 3 months of marriage. Once the honeymooning is over and once individuals have explored their bodies & mind enough - it is time to face the reality. Looks doesn’t attract anymore, neither the personality. You start hating few things you had initially loved in that person.
For instance, if a girl had told her hubby that she admires the way he cares for his mom, the same might create problems in the near future, as the wife would start thinking that he cares about her mom more than her! This is the foremost problem most couples face.
There is an intense competition, on the subconscious mind, between your mom & your wife about who has stronger hold on you! Mom would say that you have become henpecked after marriage & wife would ask, “why can’t you use your own sense to decipher life’s meanings? Why do you want to discuss everything with your mom?” This is the first problem men face in their initial part of married life. He is literally tossed between 2 women, and in this situation he is completely confused about which side to take. And if the man has few sisters too, then I am sure men are tossed even more.
The best decision you could take at this juncture is to set your priority list of people. Is it in this order - mother, father, wife & children or is it wife, mother, father & children so on so forth. But once you have listed it down, stick to it and make it clear to everyone. You will fail miserably if you thought you would stick to justice, because the problems would have risen from a TV mega serial, where in you cannot have enough evidence to base your judgment. Also never try to make everyone happy.
Stop talking & become a good listener. Listen to the allegations made by your wife about your mom, and also listen to what your mom has to complain about your wife – not in the same room of course. Listen carefully as if it is changing your perception about them, then dress up and go for a stroll. Both of them would feel light as you have taken enough garbage out of them, and the stroll you took would have unburdened yourself. It is similar to the process of throwing garbage in the street dustbin. Keeping it at home will only make the place stink.
Few things you should avoid is – don’t give your personal opinions to any of them on any issues they fought about, don’t call them for a debate so that you can be a judge, don’t yell at anyone in front of each other.
Ideally become a rock & behave like a God. May be that is the reason, why Gods in the world are mostly made of rocks, where in they just listen to your woes & never reply.
Posted by Kenni at 06:24 AM | Comments (0)
December 09, 2004
How to save your marriage – Part 1
There are few misconceptions regarding marriage in many minds. Few think that marriage is a bed of roses, and expect that events that would take place after marriage are going to be as pleasant as a fairy tale. Most movies end with a happy note where the Hero meets the Heroine, they hug, and the screen says They Lived Happily Forever! May be they don’t want to let us know how film stars’ marriages stink off screen.
There is a western concept called the concept of soul mates. Where in they believe that marriage is meeting of 2 equal halves coming together to become one perfect circle – wish life was so easy. I am not sure about soul mates, but am sure hole mates surely exist.
Marriages are destined, and you cannot do a thing to change it. You are born with the prescribed fate about whom you are going to get married, when you will be getting married, and whether it is going to be a love marriage or an arranged one. Personal preference doesn’t have any hold on it.
Marriage is not just tying of knots or sleeping together for a period of time. It is about deciding to live together in good & bad times, and also to learn our soul lessons through each other. Hence marriages are considered divine, and in most cases it is carried out in divine places like churches & temples.
Opposite poles attract & similar poles repel. Men & women are two different poles of energy, and through marriage they come together. I don’t agree in equality of gender. They cannot be equal as their purposes are different & also their priorities are different.
Expecting eternal love & harmony when 2 opposite poles come together is mere nonsense. Misunderstandings, conflicts of interest, and ego issues are bound to be there in any marital relationship. Now the level of happiness depends on the intensity of differences. Marriages go for a toss if there is unequal ratio of happiness & grief.
In my knowledge, there is not a single couple who had not talked about permanent separation in their lives at least 100 times. Still they continue to live together as it is sometimes refreshing after you had a good fight with your partner. None other in the world can tolerate so much of shit from you except your partner. They become psychological pillow for each other.
Articles to follow
Areas/topic on which most couples fight
How to solve marital problems & start living
Posted by Kenni at 05:24 AM | Comments (0)
December 07, 2004
Can astrology be sold like hot pizzas?!
Astrology portals are on a new frenzy - giving out special discounts on customized predictions. Yearly prediction costs Rs 1200 & if buy now it is just Rs 900! So hurry! Limited stocks! It is like a heart specialist putting up a board outside his dispensary – if you get yourself checked & operated before December 2004 it is Rs 500 or else I will charge you Rs 2000! Of course these kinds of management rules works perfectly with FMCG products like soaps, face creams, & powders. But astrology isn’t a product like fair & lovely, it is a divine service & selling them like hot pizzas accounts to mere confusion.
B V Raman, the father of Indian astrology, had written beautifully that a millionaire won’t mind spending lakhs in putting a ‘shamiana’ for his daughter’s wedding, but would surely refrain from paying 100 rupees extra to the astrologer who did the final marriage match making. That has always been the plight of astrologers, at least in India. The guidance, the help & the prediction given by an astrologer cannot be compensated by money alone.
Also in any society, there are bound to be equal number of believers, skeptics, believers who have become skeptics and skeptics who will become believers. Astrology isn’t for non-believers, and the best is to keep them away from it. Astrology works perfect with people who believe in divinity. It is a two-way process. Giving special discounts will only attract skeptics who want to give it a shot for the first time. For these kinds of people astrologers won’t be able to predict perfectly, hence they will never come back. And for believers these kinds of special discounts only irritate them. End of the day no purpose is solved.
If the astrologer is good & his predictions are 90 per cent accurate people will even travel miles together to consult him. And if he is not good, he won’t be consulted even he stays in your neighborhood.
Of course the prices of astrological services are quite high on the internet. Not that the whole money goes to the astrologer. In fact majority of the amount is put in maintaining the sites, servers & paying up the people who run the websites.
Astrologers are simple human beings and they do get greedy for money at times. Customized readings need a lot of manual interpretations and for this an astrologer would need a lot of psychic energy. Ideally an astrologer can do only 10 horoscopes per day, and anything beyond that is out of question. And also this is one profession where you cannot have assistance or MBA graduates working under you. You run the show yourself.
Try not to go for astrological products based on the price factor but go by the astrologer’s caliber. And if you trust 100 per cent in God even a fake astrologer would predict perfectly for you.
Posted by Kenni at 06:30 AM | Comments (0)
December 03, 2004
Do your homework before you attend an interview!
It is an old story but it is based on a real life incident – the main cast being none other than ME! The period was 1999, and there was a boom in the Dot Com industry. I was getting bored doing the same mundane job at expressindia.com, and was searching for a new job desperately. The erstwhile Chip Magazine was getting into their web edition and they were seeking a content manager who could manage their portal.
I had applied for the job by mail, and I got a reply. Their channel head, I forgot his name but never could forget his form, asked me to meet him the next day. I was never a good job hopper, since I always hated to attend interviews. What I hate the most is to reply to questions like –
Tell us something about yourself – I am not sure what would they reply if someone said they get attracted to same sex people!
Why do you want to change your job? - Because I have a wonderful relationship with my boss, I am getting more than expected pay hikes and dumb people are never made managers. But still I want to change because I am like that only.
I reached the Chip office on time, and met the person who wanted to meet me. He was 6 feet, huge, similar to the one who steals Dinosaurs DNA in Jurassic Park 1 – but he was his darker version. He took me into a cabin - from what I saw was, they were busy setting up their new office.
He offered me a chair, he sat opposite to me – and in a very low voice started talking about their plans, their ideas, and what their company is up to. I hardly could hear him. I was just assuming most of the things he was saying –anyways these introductions were not going to help me much. I was waiting for him to come to the point or rather allow me to talk. After nearly 10 minutes he stopped and suddenly he asked me on top of his voice, “now Kennedi tell me. Why Jasubhai?”
I was taken by surprise and I immediately asked him, “who is Jasubhai?”
There was pin drop silence for a moment. He wasn’t sure what to do, neither I was. I didn’t know what went wrong I was still thinking why was he asking me about some Jasubhai? I was started to doubt myself now - did he talk about that person when I could not hear him? Then after a couple of minutes he said – Jasubhai is the name of our publication and Chip magazine is one of its publications! I said fine. The interview was over, and thankfully as expected I never got a job there.
Posted by Kenni at 12:15 PM | Comments (1)
November 27, 2004
When I was about to kill a child!
The year was 1998, and I got a call from my wife. She said she is pregnant, and I thought it is high time I got married to her. I was just 22, and my take home salary was 6,600. Most of my friends advised me not to get married so early in life, and that too when I didn’t have a permanent job. In Indian Express, Mumbai even the CEO was on contract.
We got married and we moved to Mumbai. We didn’t had any rent to pay as it was my parents’ house, still I thought my salary wasn’t enough for 2 people in Mumbai – a city which is considered to be one of the costly places to live in India. And now I had a 3rd person to take care – the one in the womb. From childhood I never wanted my probable wife to work. I always am against woman working. Like I always say a bull and a cow have different purposes in life. Bull is to plough the field, and the cow is to milk. Any change can only change the balance of life.
For woman I always felt being a good wife is more difficult than passing out MBA from IIM, becoming a mother is more difficult than working for the biggest company, and maintaining children, family and home is more difficult than running a corporate. I am totally against children being ignored for some extra money, or lifestyle for that matter.
We thought, and we decided that we would abort the kid and think about having children later in our lives. We met a gynecologist, and here is the conversation…
Me – Somehow, we aren’t interested in this baby. We want to abort it.
Gynec - why?
Me – ‘cause I think I cannot afford a kid at this juncture
Gynec – what’s your salary?
Me – 6,600
Gynec – and I have clients whose monthly salary is 1000 to 2000, having 2 kids and who manage to send their children to English medium schools.
Me - ?
Gynec – it is all in the mind. Money will never be sufficient. Even crorepathis go only for 2 children hence it has nothing to do with your economic conditions. And also by the time you need to send your children to a school i.e., after 3 years, you never know how much you will be earning.
Me – (I was listening carefully)
Gynec – Never ever abort children. They are God’s gifts, and I know couples who come to me crying just because they aren’t able to conceive. That way you are blessed couples. I will check her (my wife) up first, take 5 minutes to think, and we can do what exactly what you want.
She also added that it is never advisable to abort the first kid, as the body starts repelling future fertilization.
I came out, and was staring at the sky. I didn’t know what to do. There was no one to guide us. The only thing I could do is to take out a Re 1 coin, pray to lord and toss it. If it is tail, I go for it and if it is head I don’t. In life I always found that ‘tail’ was lucky for me. May be in the subconscious mind I had already decided. I tossed and it was tail! My wife came out and before I told her my decision, she came with water in her eyes saying, “we will go for it. The doc said that the kid is growing well.”
We named the kid Tilotama, but then for some unknown reasons my wife had a miscarriage. And it was all over. May be God wanted it that way.
Looking back I thank the almighty and the Re 1 coin, that I wasn’t responsible for a fetus’s death.
I read somewhere that in 3 months a baby is well developed and it tries the best to survive the killing (abortion).
I agree with what Mother Teresa has to say about abortion, “you don’t have rights to kill a child, when you cannot create one.”
Khalil Gibran says, “your children are not your children. They are just born through you. And they belong to the future.”
Deciding not to go for children is completely different than aborting it after it is formed - there are enough contraceptives available in the market, which can help you to delay pregnancy.
Taking on a newly formed fetus for your irresponsible sexual episode is highly condemnable!
Posted by Kenni at 05:36 AM | Comments (3)
November 09, 2004
Even ‘nonsense’ has a divine reason!
After 7 months of blogging, 156 articles, 9000 page views, 30 clients and close to 75 comments - I feel like Mullah Nasruddin! I am reminded of the story where Mullah Nasruddin and his son were going to the market to sell their ass – I mean donkey.
All the three were walking, while someone commented that how foolish these guys are, they can very well sit on the donkey and go. Mullah sat on the donkey as he was a bit old, and they started walking. Someone else commented, what kind of father he is. He makes his young son walk, and he himself is having a ball of a time. Mullah got down, and made his son sit on the donkey. Midway someone commented again, look at these fools one is walking while there is enough place for two on the donkey. Mullah, climbed over the donkey too, just to see someone commenting, these buggers are heartless. How can they be so mean and make the torture the donkey? Both of them got down now, and started carrying the donkey – and the whole market laughed at them. This is exactly what happens to individuals, if they live their lives according to others’ whims and fancies.
I was advised by one of my well-wishers that too much of sexual content on your blog will look unprofessional on your part as you are a professional astrologer now. Point taken. But then I really wonder, what’s wrong if astrologers think, write or indulge in sexual intimacies? Astrologers aren’t godmen. They are as human as other mortals are, just that they pray a lot to perfect their predictive skills. And interesting I came across a book written on Nakshtra (birthstar) Matching and Sexual Life. If ever I were asked to write a book on astrology, my first book would be on ‘Moon Sign and Your Sexual Preferences.’
Not all my blogs are good, and not all my blogs make sense. Sometimes I love to write nonsense and sometimes it happens to be nonsense without my conscious effort. As Swami Vivakananda says, education is the manifestation of perfection already present in a man, same way junks are needed for the good to surface.
Most people fail in the process of perfecting art, and no art can be perfected - that remains the truth. Sachin looks damn neat when he hits a six but the same shot looks ugly if the ball is caught at the long on. Moviemakers always face this situation, where in their movies flop even when they know that it had all the masala which people expect. Problems are bound to happen if you TRY to match others expectations, also when you try to make others happy. There is no need to make others happy, that also doesn’t mean you start living in solitude.
Trust in God, believe in yourself, follow your inner voice, and trust your conscience. Neither take appreciation seriously nor criticism - both are one and the same. They both are bound to affect your inner happiness.
Always remember - 'Wise men are those who cared a hair about what others thought about their presence, their attire and their attitude!'
Posted by Kenni at 10:19 AM | Comments (0)
November 04, 2004
The ‘no-nonsense’ way to lose weight!
Statistics say 70 per cent of the Americans suffer from obesity and 70 per cent of the people in Somalia die of starvation. That is how WE the people have disbursed the natural resource. We bother more about our country borders than human lives. Now that is not what I wanted to blog about today. It is about how programs of ‘losing weight’ are catching with the younger CORPORATE generation, and how they successfully fail in losing that extra pound.
Paunch was considered to be a sign of prosperity a couple of decades back. Even today among politicians, police officers, and government officials – huge paunches are signs of the amount of money they make…I mean the extra money they make through people. Unlike them, the people who work for IT industries and BPOs are constantly worried about the extra flesh they carry, for they know they are MORE susceptible for paunches.
Both men and women rush to lose their weights just before getting married so that probably they don’t have major problems in experimenting with various positions. Or probably they think being skinny is always beautiful – not to forget that most men like HEALTHY women.
Here are few common ways people try to lose their weight
Dieting
There is a common misconception that skipping meals will slim you down. It can only make you weaker – both physically and emotionally. I knew of a person who came to me to ask about tips to lose weight. And he proudly said, he skips break fast everyday, and still he is unsuccessful. People, who skip meals, hog like pigs in their next course – and the end result remains the same.
NEVER EVER SKIP MEALS.
Exercising
If someone comments at your belly, the first thing you decide is to get up early the next morning. You dig in your old pair of shoes, and run for some 4-5 kms. Your food intake become more to compensate for the exercise you do, you jog for 5 days, and stick to the new intake habit. End of the day you have only succeeded in increasing your appetite.
Medical Treatment
This is a new system used by the otherwise unsuccessful medical practitioner. How long will they keep meeting sick people for a meager amount of Rs 30 per consultation? They embarked on an innovative idea of sucking people….I mean sucking their extra fat using liposuction. And they graciously charge Rs 15 k per sitting. End result – you will shot for a photo session for a ‘before after’ picture in newspapers. I honestly doubt about the credibility of the pic. Which is before and which is after!
We also tend to accept that what is built in few years, should not be lost in a month - only demolition of buildings happen that way. Reconstruction always need time, and extra care.
Here are few tips formulated by experienced people to help you lose weight with a smile on your face.
Break your meal to 6 times a day
Scientifically, the capacity of human stomach is just 50 ml. Rest is just expansion. You can very well know this by noticing those sexy waists of FTV models. Hence, break your food intake. Eat 6 times a day, and not a single time fill your stomach. Keep in mind the EXACT capacity of your stomach – it is only 50 ml!
The timing could be - 8 am, 11 am, 2 pm, 5 pm, 7 pm and 10 pm.
Eat before you get hungry
Usually people tend to eat more when they are hungry. Though ayurveda say you should eat only after getting hungry, it is for those yogis who have only ONE meal a day. Watch for a day to know at time you get hungry. If it is 10 am, 1 pm, 5 pm and 9 pm, have your meal at 9 am, 12 noon, 4 pm, and 8 pm.
This way you surely will eat less, also you won’t become weak as you keep eating the whole day.
Never allow your stomach to be full
Don’t eat so much that you keep belching the whole day. Eat ¾ of stomach, and the rest ¼ can be filled with plain water.
Postpone eating food you love
Everyone has few special dishes that they love to eat like mad. It could be those spicy samosas or hot pizzas or it could be a bowl filled with ice creams. There is NO harm in eating what you love, but then just postpone the decision, and you will tend to eat the same food – with more joy, and also you will not crave for it.
Also when the food is on your table, look at the food for a while, and imagine how probably it would taste. Allow yourself to drool for a moment, and then start eating. This was one reason why people were asked to PRAY before they eat, so that they feed their stomach and not their minds.
Eat whatever you want, but in limit
Whenever you visit a hotel or a restaurant, order for food what you love, but share with your friend than hogging it alone. If you feel it is enough, pack it home and you can have the same after 3-4 hours. Don’t avoid anything you love to eat – it can only create a craving, and you will never lose that extra tire you have around your belly!
Lose only 2 kgs a month
Your waist cannot be like that of Aishwarya Rai’s overnight. You have taken a couple of months or should I say years to put on weight, so don’t expect miracles to happen. Set your target for losing 2 kgs in a month, and that is ideal and also healthy. In 6 months you can lose 12 kgs, and then sustain, and this is without fasting, dieting, exercising, or spending a fortune on slimming centers.
If you need a customized advise on How to lose weight with a smile, buzz me on kennedig@yahoo.com - I charge Rs 1000, and this is refundable if you lose 4 kgs in 2 months. For I am here to help you lose weight!
Posted by Kenni at 06:04 AM | Comments (5)
October 24, 2004
Things I hate the most in life!
If only external factors didn’t affect our internal harmony am sure most Buddhist Monks and Indian Saints would have been seen in the crowded trains of Mumbai or in the fully packed Chennai buses. Though most people are in constant search of peace inside themselves, there is no doubt that the mental peace to a very large extent depends on what is happening outside us. No wonder the real seeker is seen meditating in the silent valleys of Himalayas and not in any of the metropolitan cities.
I am generally happy, content and have no complaints in life. But there surely are few things that trigger the animal in me, and here is the list of the things I hate the most in life.
Irritating Horns and High Speed vehicles in City Limits
I was told that in Holland, if someone horns – he is considered to be an illiterate. I am not sure how true that info is, but if the same principle is applied in India – 90 per cent of the people who drive behave like illiterates. There are enough number of people who shut themselves in the ac car, and horn their way to glory when they surely know that they are stuck in a heavy traffic. It is not that the driver in the front has some vengeance against you, or loves to irritate you. He is not moving because he cannot. And your horn won’t help much to clear the traffic.
None cares about you. You can drive at 100 kms/hr, ram the electric poll and die. But see to it nobody else dies in the process. Most of the time it has happened that the driver has escaped unhurt killing innocent pedestrians. Salman Khan should know this better.
Remedy
Whoever is seen horning mercilessly can be taken to the remotest part of the city.
Tie their head to the horn speakers, and keep it ON for the whole day. Gandhian way of ahimsa will not help much curing this menace.
Mobile phones in movie halls
Thanks to Reliance to have made mobile phones a necessity than a luxury. But there is no decrease in the number of people who still love to show off their mobile phones.
The movie is The 6th Sense, the climax is on, Bruce Willis comes to meet his wife and there comes a call to a person who sits adjacent to me. The phone glows, and the bugger yells 4 times on the phone that he will call the caller later, and he thinks he is smart enough to have cut the call. The movie is over, and I curse him for rest of my life.
Remedy
Jam all public places, where mobile phones can prove irritating.
People can be asked to surrender their mobile phone at the theater counter, for none is going to miss a million dollar deal by not having a phone for 3 hours.
Chennai Auto Drivers
My father always cracked a joke that most auto drivers have the meters in their mouth, and it holds true when it comes to Chennai Auto Drivers. They are born to irritate the Chennaites, and are one of the most cursed people I am sure.
They don’t show any mercy in charging the probable customer thrice or 4 times the right charge. They make sure that in all the possible deals they remain the final winners…
*If you ask them to put the meter ON, they surely will abide, as it is already rigged to move faster than the auto itself
*If you refuse to take the rick, they will arrogantly ask you to catch a bus instead
*If you agree in giving him what he asks, he will take the shortest route possible
*If you succeed in bargaining, he will keep abusing you till you reach your destiny
They indeed rule Chennai’s road, and it is 4 years I am in Chennai now, and I am yet to see an honest auto rickshaw guy.
Remedy
Have an investigative team, which will cancel auto licenses immediately if they are seen fooling people
5 years Rigorous Imprisonment for the drivers
Learn to ride an auto rickshaw
Girls who flirt
I don’t mind holding your hand, I don’t mind hugging you and I don’t mind kissing you too – all because you are my best friend and will remain ONE forever! There are enough number of girls with that attitude, who have a ball of a time with guys of their choice. But when it comes to marriage – they have their own reservations. They experiment with their freedom only till they are successful in getting all they wanted - “without any commitment”. Their parents take rest of the decisions ‘cause they have better access to US grooms!
Remedy
Let them go, and don’t forget to see them off at the airport. What else can you do?
Posted by Kenni at 06:04 AM | Comments (5)
October 21, 2004
Help others when they need, not when they don’t need!
I had already started to hate the world and the people around me during my last few days at my previous office. I disliked the way people turned thankless with time, and how they started back biting without remembering the past. Anybody’s life is all about events unfolding in a cycle - what comes down goes up and what goes up surely comes down someday – it is just a matter of time. Don’t ever think that people can always remain on the top – it has NEVER EVER happened in the history of mankind. Hitler, Alexander, Nepolean – and all those who thought were invincible had to eat dirt with time, and this holds good to every individual.
It doesn’t hurt you much, when people point their finger when you had planned their downfall, but it honestly feels disappointing when others turn their back even when you tried to help them. There is one argument, which makes sense at this point– why bother about what others think about you. Stick to what you think is right and leave rest to God –a thought frame easy to be told but difficult to implement.
I had a childhood friend, who was very close to me and also damn good at studies. His father was a drunkard who never bothered about the family and unfortunately his mom died in a fire accident. He was left alone, and he didn’t know what to do with his life. We moved to our native, and I came back after few years just to know that he was a gangster now. He had joined Mumbai’s then famous gang-war group called Manchekar’s group. My neighbour advised me that I should not meet him and talk to him. I cared a hair for his advice. I met my friend, and asked him why did he do that? He said a man could be alive for just 15 days without food, and you never know what you will do when you are hungry. I am being thankful to the person who fed me for months together without asking me a single question. He made immense sense to me.
Karna from Mahabharata is an amazing example to explain to what extent a person can remain thankful to the person who helped him in his bad times. Karna was insulted in a fully packed auditorium for not having his roots from renowned ancestors. Duryodhan, was the only person to help him out by calling him from his team and giving him an equal status. Karna stood on Duryodhan’s side, even when he knew that he was fighting against his own brothers. He made sure that Duryodhan never came to know about this fact, and he remained loyal till he died.
Giving someone a gift when he himself can afford one isn’t a good karma we are doing. Help someone who really is in need, and the gifting exercise will altogether have a different meaning.
Buy street children some Cadbury chocolate, donate Rs 10 to a temple pujari, and help some elderly people in crossing the roads or climbing the lift – they will remain thankful to you forever!
Posted by Kenni at 06:03 AM | Comments (11)
September 26, 2004
Why commit suicide, when you have so many options left?
I was sure it was all over. The mind knew what was coming but the heart refused to accept. I was giving my last best shot and forcing things to happen. Logical conditioning is very hard to be broken as we are trained to try and try until we succeed - which is absolute nonsense. Any man gets the first glimpse of how destiny works when his first girl ditches him. You can’t change a thing in this world. Those last 2 months were the time when I was moving around with a strip of sleeping pills, and was sure that there could not be any life without her!
7 years later - I am married to a nice woman, and also have been blessed with 2 wonderful daughters. Life looks so good today, the future seems damn bright, and I understand how we live for others and not for ourselves. Looking back I feel how dumb I was to have thought about ending my life, only because ONE person in the world didn’t wanted to spend her life with me – a person who probably didn’t deserved my presence.
Once I happened to my wife to name the person who has loved her the most in her school days. She said, “ Saravanan.” I asked what is he doing now, and she said he committed suicide when they were studying in the 9th standard. He committed suicide because he had many personal problems, and also because I had rejected his proposal, she said coolly. I was a bit shocked, and I asked her, don’t you feel guilty about the same, she said why should I feel guilty? I was too young to decide, and also it would be my last option to marry a person like him who is so weak in his character! It was an enlightening experience for me to know that girls care a hair about guys who beg, plead or cry for love. They need a stronger shoulder to take care for them.
People commit suicide for 2 major reasons – 1) debt and 2) failure in relationships. Every individual has to face these 2 situations at least once in their lifetime, and if everyone thought that killing thyself could solve the problem – world’s population would drop by ¼. Here are few things you can imbibe before you take THE drastic decision…
When in debt
Mani Ratnam’s brother and movie producer GV is a classic example of people who die due to the fear of humility. He committed suicide a year back just because he didn’t have enough money to pay back the moneylenders, and he left behind the family to suffer. Very few people know that none could anything to you if you honestly don’t have the money to repay. The maximum that can happen is you will get arrested.
Think that you are freedom fighter for a while, surrender yourself to the police and get arrested. You can stay in the jail for about 10 days come out in bail. And once you are out you are ZERO DEBT! What would the society think about you if you go to the jail? Show them the middle finger!
Failure in relationships
Now that you have decided to end your life don’t stop yourself if you seriously feel that an assortment of protruding flesh is more important than your parents, siblings and friends who need your presence.
Carve this deep into you mind that your death WILL not bring the minutest change in the person who has decided to dump you. She will get married, have babies and will live a long and fruitful life like ‘Rose’ of Titanic, who happily saved her life by hanging onto the wooden plank.
Time is a best healer or I should say time reshuffles your memories perfectly. The next time you think about committing suicide postpone the decision or buzz me at kennedig@yahoo.com
Posted by Kenni at 07:30 AM | Comments (4)
September 17, 2004
Sony Walkman – Rs 200 only!
Our 1-month training at ‘The Statesman’, New Delhi was getting over, and we had to book out tickets back to Coimbatore. We, Chandru and me, were the last people to complete our summer training, while rest of the people had already joined the curriculum. Chandru was a philosopher whose only aim was to start a religion of his own, while I was a gadget freak.
As we were moving towards Nizamuddin to book our tickets, a local guy wearing blue jacket approached us. He removed a polythene bag from his jacket, unwrapped the paper cover, and showed us a sexy Sony Walkman. We weren’t interested, we told him ‘boss nahi chahiye’, and he interesting recorded our voice and played it for us. It was good to hear our own voice, and I was now interested to buy it.
I asked for the price and he said, you decide. We knew it was a second hand piece, or could be a stolen one too. I said Rs 200? And he insisted on Rs 400. 2 mns of conversation, and we decided we will buy only if he gives it to us for Rs 200. We started moving, and he packed the walkman in that paper packet, put it in the polythene bag, and kept it in his jacket.
We were sure that we wouldn’t take it till he gives it for the price we asked for. I was watching him without his knowledge, and he was following us. He came near us, and agreed for Rs 200 and asked us keep it immediately in our bag, as it is a stolen product. He removed the polythene bag packet from the jacket, and helped us keep in Chandru’s bag. I took out the money, and handed it over to him and suddenly he said – ‘are aapne to 400 bola tha, phir 200 kaise de rahe ho?’ (you said Rs 400 and why are giving only 200?). I was taken aback Chandru immediately wanted to take the walkman out of this bag, and this guy yelled some 4-5 names – hey changu, mangu, dhilip, suresh…and we were surrounded by these local thugs in fraction of second. Honestly, I was scared but Chandru kept his cool even when he wasn’t that comfortable with Hindi. He said, that we are from the press and let us go to the police – thankfully we had the visiting cards of our Chief Reported of Statesman.
The guys got a bit scared, and the guy who sold the walkman said it is ok, no issues - go ahead. He asked us to use another road, so that we don’t get caught by the police anywhere. We took the longer route – in fact had to walk some 5 kms before we could get a bus to Munirka, the place where we resided.
The incident left a bitter experience in our minds, and I kept appreciating Chandru for his bold action at the right time. We were scared so much so that we didn’t even bother to take the walkman out of our bag. We boarded the bus, and we kept mum. The whole incident disturbed us so much so that we dunno what to talk.
Munirka was just 1 minute away, and something struck me hard. I looked at Chandru, and the same thing struck Chandru too. We immediately got down from the bus, and opened the bag. We took out the polythene bag, unwrapped the paper cover, and to our shock what we got was a wooden block! We had paid Rs 200 for a wooden piece!! Chandru dropped the stuff down, and we continued moving towards our room in utter silence!
Posted by Kenni at 06:14 AM | Comments (7)
September 08, 2004
How to meditate? – part 1
One of my skeptic friends called me at 10 pm from Bangalore and asked me to give him some quick tips on how to meditate. I thought instead of explaining him the whole procedure over the phone or typing them in my messenger window, I would rather blog on the topic so that it will be useful for all those who read my blog regularly.
Please note – Most of the things I know about meditation has come out of my personal experiences under the guidance of my spiritual teacher, and few of them are out of the knowledge I had gained reading books.
1) Personality Check - Who am I? Or who you are?
All techniques don’t suit all the people. If Ramana Maharishi, could get enlightened just by asking himself ‘who am I’, don’t think even you will get enlightened asking the same question repeatedly. It won’t help you much.
The first and the foremost check you need to do is – to find our your own energy pattern. There are only 3 prescribed levels and you surely will fall under one –
1) Rajasik
2) Tamasik
3) Satwik
Rajasik – people who are bold, action oriented and violent to a very large extent.
Tamasik – people who are optimistic, hard working, and who possess less energy than the Rajasik people
Satwik – people who are very slow, a bit pessimistic, and strong believers
The right Guru can identify your energy pattern at once, and could prescribe you the best possible meditation technique.
2) Reason - Why do you want to meditate?
There are many reasons a person wants to meditate. Some want to get liberated from their birth-death cycle, some want to use it as an escape route from the nagging wife, some do it for relaxation, some want to rise their kundalini, and some want to just show off that they meditate too.
Will be continued in part 2…Meanwhile try to find out in which energy pattern you fall in – Rajasik, Tamasik or Satwik.
Headings to follow…
*The best meditation techniques for Rajasik, Tamasik and Satwik people
*Mental preparation before you start meditation
*Steps for meditation
*How often you need to meditate
*What can you achieve through meditation
*The best meditation techniques for the modern man
*The difference between yoga and meditation
*Why bhakti is better than meditation in 21st Century
Posted by Kenni at 08:03 AM | Comments (0)
September 07, 2004
Friend in need, need not be a friend at all!
We were 11 girls and 5 boys, and our seniors called us ‘SWEET 16’. No, we weren’t performing one of Osho’s forbidden therapies, but were doing our Masters in Mass Communication and journalism from PSG college of Arts and Science, Coimbatore. Who said politics happen only in corporate office? It happens wherever people want to prove their power - it could be to prove their power of designation or it could be to prove their power of gender.
We had a funny reason for the girls to play politics in our class. The reason was quite childish…they just wanted to prove how many GUYS they can get on their team. And mind you we were only 5 guys – and we had a rocking time, I should say! Our prof wasn’t happy about what was happening, and unlike everyday, this time he came out with a sensible statement. He said – College is the last place you will find FRIENDS, so don’t waste your time on petty things! I ignored what he said, until I realized it myself very recently.
Once you enter the arena of work culture, the people you meet are – your colleagues, your peers, your superiors and your bosses, and rarely would you find a real friend. They will wish you a good morning, they will have lunch with you, they will greet you on your birthday, they will enquire about your family, and finally will bitch about you to your boss behind your back – that will screw your happiness for rest of your life.
I had a friend who used to pray to god that…save me from my friends, for I know what my enemies are up to.
There are few important things you need to know to avoid becoming a fool in the corporate world…
*Never trust anyone completely
*Avoid talking to people who don’t look into your eyes
*Don’t waste time with people from whom you cannot expect any thing
*Don’t indulge in office gossip
*Don’t trust SOMEONE who seems to be good to everyone
Remember you are here for a business relationship and your only aim is to make money and build rapport. Of course you can talk with everyone, spread positive energy, and have a gala time - but think twice before going for a friendship deal…who knows he/she might become your boss some day!
Posted by Kenni at 06:44 AM | Comments (0)
August 30, 2004
Why August 30, 2004 is very special for me!
Today my wife and I complete our 6th year of married life. And this year stays particularly special, as she has honoured me with the best gift possible – a daughter! Yeah, I am a father of 2 girl children today, and I feel a lot proud about the same. The first angel is called Tejeswini and we are planning to name the second one as Priyadarshini.
The presence of God becomes more obvious when a fetus is formed in the womb of a woman. The process of pregnancy and childbirth, in my opinion, could not go as smooth as it goes without the intervention of the almighty, even when people argue that it is just a natural process.
We always go to a church-run small hospital near my place that is known for their record in normal deliveries. So much so that they don’t even have equipment for a caesarian. The hospital is run by a few simple Christian Nuns, who believe in God and prayers more than in science and modern tools.
They don’t advertise, they don’t have a/c wards, and they don’t have computer billing-system. All they have is experience and the grace of God. I am not a Christian freak, but I have admired the way these missionaries have served humanity for ages. Yeah there are controversies about religious conversion, but still the service they render is beyond par and always admirable.
There is another trend where the doctors deliberately go for Caesarians just to meet their hospital expenses. A Caesarian would cost 3-4 times more than a normal delivery, but who cares when there is enough money in patient’s pockets. And also there are woman who hate to go through the pain of normal delivery nowadays. They forget one truth that, this 2 hours of labour pain is always less than the life-long pain she will be undergoing just because of the surgery.
I incidentally learnt from one of my NRI friends that, in the US none prefers to go for a Caesarian, and all prefer a normally delivery. Mind it – a normal kid weighs at least 4.5 to 5 kgs. Also most Americans don’t go for any birth-control operations. Presently each American family goes for 3-4 children and we have stopped it at 1 just because our government promised us a better life. People have started investing in land, fixed deposits, and insurances rather than in children, and the government has succeeded in taking your money with the hope that you will die a millionaire some day.
Here is the address of the hospital in case you want to consult them…
St Pius Hospital
Perungudi
Chennai – 96
Ph – 24964614
Meanwhile let me get ready for my 3rd kid!
Posted by Kenni at 06:16 AM | Comments (0)
August 21, 2004
Nag Panchami - and a snake visits my house!
I was busy with some important work at office, and I got a call from my wife. She said a snake has come into the house, and she is scared – obviously. She lives alone at home with my daughter Tejeswini and dog Venus. My house is some 5 kms from my office, and I could not reach my house in less than 20 mns. Intelligently, at least I thought I was, I asked what is the colour of the snake and she said – full green. I immediately knew it wasn’t poisonous, and asked her not to kill the snake!
I got a call in another 15 mns, my daughter who has just started talking said – the snake is dead! My wife had already killed the snake by hitting it with a stick. I asked her to keep the dead snake safe till I reach home.
We had a BIG argument at home about why she killed the snake when I said it was non-poisonous snake, and she kept arguing that it was poisonous according to what she had known.
Snakes are basically very shy animals and they avoid people as far as possible. They can sense the noise of human steps using its tongue and mostly slide away. It attacks only under dire situations when it feels its life is under danger.
Today snakes have become endangered species just because most snakes are killed under the impression that they are poisonous. The pathetic part is we aren’t educated enough to identify them or to catch them alive, which I feel is a must for every individual if we need to preserve them.
In India most of the things around us has been given a divine significance and snakes are one among them. Lord Shiva has a snake whirled around his neck, looks quite impressive in photo or sculpture. I am not sure how many people would enter a temple if Shiva idol had a real snake around its neck?
Pouring milk or providing eggs once a year to snakes, and killing them for the rest of 364 days is mere nonsense. The best way we can impress the God is to keep them alive, and learn how to deal with them.
Man has been proven to be the most selfish and the dangerous species on the planet. He has killed most of the animals around him, and also killed enough of his own breed. No other animal in the world kills its own species without reason…it is a copyright activity of human beings.
I reached home and did my last ritual to the dead snake. I burnt it, and prayed for its soul. All said and done, I am not sure what would I done if I was at home instead of my wife in a similar situation!
Posted by Kenni at 04:44 AM | Comments (3)
August 20, 2004
Money matters!
Before I open up with all that happened in my life in the past 6 months, I would like to share something interesting with you guys. I am now one of the panel astrologers on Sify Astrology - here is the URL you can visit to buy my customized products. At present I have showcased only one product – and I will be introducing 9 other products at the earliest.
The last 6 months have the best in my life so far. A period in which I started hating most things around me…the job, the people, and the whole world to be precise. May be I took Bollywood star Shahrukh Khan’s words too seriously in my life.
I was damn impressed with one of Shahrukh Khan’s statements in one of his interviews. He was asked how do you feel having so much money, fame and wealth. And he replied they are just peripherals. What I like is acting and I do it with 100 per cent sincerity, rest comes on its own. His advice was, “never work for money - just go behind your passion and dream.”
I did exactly what he said, and to be honest what I was left was a dream and hell lot of passion. Passion doesn’t feed your family nor would get your kid an admission in the school. What you need end of the day is MONEY– this was the first lesson I learnt.
The present world gauges you on the basis of where you work and how much you earn, and most friendships and relationships are based on them. Love, honesty, dedication and loyalty are few soothing words that sounds great to be heard once in a while.
The world around you is a heaven when you are positioned well, and the same world could be a hell if you fall down – monetarily. Philosophies, dogmas, scriptures come handy only when you have other things in place. A beggar won’t be thinking about God when his stomach is empty. Religion, God and Godmen are for those people who need not have to worry about their food, cloths, shelter and wealth.
I have a friend who beautifully said – I want to do a lot of social service, and for that I need money. So I am chasing money now. Once I get it, I will get into service. Made great sense to me.
Life revolves around this limited resource called money….and I think I need to do what I hated the most in life – chase money.
PS – You can trust money-minded people who accept money is important in life more than the self-proclaimed saints who claim that money isn’t important.
Posted by Kenni at 05:30 AM | Comments (4)
August 04, 2004
Can gems change your destiny?
Who doesn’t want to change his/her life? It would have been ideal if God had given a bit MORE of everything we have. Everyone seeks for better parents, a better salary, a better house, a better car, a better country to live in, a better wife and a better person to have sex with. None is content with what he has and is always in search of a better tomorrow. The hope and the dream of a better tomorrow is what have lead to all the misdevelopment around us. Or else we would have lived happily with what the existence had to offer to us.
Astrology is one science that helps in understanding human destiny and also that which provides immense faith to people. None goes to an astrologer when things are moving perfectly as expected. Why should anyone believe in astrology when the time is right? There is no need. But the divine knows when exactly to make a person move towards bigger sciences in life, and it also knows how to check mate a person and where and how.
In Vedic astrology there are various remedial measures, which promises to reduce the ill effect of bad time or bad planetary phase. It varies from going to a temple, chanting mantras, donations, wearing rudrakshas, to wearing of lucky gems!
Selling gems is indeed a multi million business today and there are no ways that you can differentiate between an original and a duplicate gem – all looks the same (and each astrologer will have his own definition to prove which one is original and which is not). Also you can never find an astrologer who respects other astrologer’s prescription, nor could you find a single gem shop that acknowledges the quality of other gem dealers – all think they are the only God send people on earth.
Gems are worn both by believer and non-believers. Believers accept that they are wearing out of their own choice, and non-believers say they are wearing just because someone else asked them to do so, and they don’t want to hurt their sentiments. It is not that non-believers don’t accept the concept, just that they don’t want to be looked down upon as a believer – it could be an ego-hurting phenomena.
There are various ways gems are prescribed to a person. Some use the system based on Sun signs, and a few use a system called dowsing, few use intuition, and few use tarot cards. Even in Vedic astrology there are different ways a gem can be prescribed. Some prescribe it based on the strongest planet, and some based on the weakest planet. There are others who ask the native to keep changing the gems depending on the dasha and bhukti that which is running. Every astrologer will have his own arguments to back the concept he believes in.
End of the day it all depends on the astrologer you meet up. And again it is your own destiny about what kind of astrologer you will meet in your life.
Personally I don’t think Gems help a lot in bringing about major changes in life, though it could act as a good ornament on your fingers and neck.
Want to know about your lucky gem? Mail me your date, place and time of birth today!
Posted by Kenni at 08:39 AM | Comments (0)
August 03, 2004
I am yet to crack what death is!
I am back after a fabulous trip to Coorg, Bellur and Hallibed with my friend in his new Ford Ikon. I wanted to blog about the wonderful trip, but then my teacher’s father passed away last evening after a massive cardiac arrest. Hence thought would share few thoughts he had shared with me when he was alive.
Death has been the most mysterious concept to me till date. My imagination stops, and my mind become blanks if I try to analyze what death exactly is. I got a called in the morning and astrologer K Gopalakrishnan (my teacher), informed me about his father’s death, and I instantly asked when are you taking the body to the crematorium. BODY?!! He had a name and he had few relationships attached to his being. He was a father, he was a husband, he was a friend and he was a well wisher (I honestly don’t know his name, I called him mama) and the moment he died he is referred to as a corpse…and nothing else.
There was no sign of ailment, and the death was unexpected. In one sense it is good to die without getting bed ridden – we can at least presume that to be a blessing in disguise, but the suddenness of the event could create real panic for the people who care.
I got introduced to him in 2002. My astrology class used to start at 6 am, and he would be the first person to greet me. At 68, he used to get up at 4 am; getting up early is the one of the most difficult habits to be cultivated.
He always had a beautiful smile on his face, and his forehead used to be full of vibhuti, kum kum and a paste of chandan – giving him a divine look. Kancheepuram was one place he used to love to visit, and we had a plan to together someday – which didn’t materialize.
He was blessed with an amazing sense of humour, and could make anyone laugh. He had traveled a lot, and could mimic too. I should say a wonderful person to be with.
He had a special adoration for me because of my love towards Lord Ayyappa and my yearly pilgrimage to Sabarimala. He incidentally had traveled to this shrine 7 times, with his father, and the commonality brought was together.
Out of love, he happened to give me few advice about life, and it mattered a lot to me..
1) Be witty
2) Never lie
3) Never cheat
4) Never borrow or take loans
5) Never eat out
6) Invest in children and lands
7) Stick to one wife and one God
He said, just by sticking to these preliminary things you can have a content life, and you need not undergo any sufferings. Will try to stick to them, and let me see….
May his sole rest in peace!
Posted by Kenni at 11:33 AM | Comments (0)
July 29, 2004
Dear Shoaib Akhtar!
Hope you remember me, in case you don’t here is a quick recap. After all the hulla-gulla you guys created about my blog on one of the leading portals – here is the copy of the last blog I had posted, the nasty comment you had left, and my response to your comment – though 4 months late.
BTW guys I am leaving for Coorg with my friend Suraj Varma tomorrow and will be back on August 2nd, 2004. Check out tips on how to get in and get out of an extra marital affair on Monday ;)
MY LAST BLOG
Just was made to realise how important my job, wife, kid and Venus (my new dog) was important than wasting my time on blogging and arguing on freedom of expression - by my sister.
Before I say a final adieu a prediction for myself -
In my horoscope I have Venus (the planet of sex) and Ketu (the planet of religion & spirituality) in my 3rd house of written communication. And the day is not far when people have to spend money to talk to me, and read my documented work!
Happy Blogging!
YOUR COMMENT
Great man, great. I was just thinking of bowling you one of the nastiest yorker that would have broken your toe for writing crap and making us read all this. As for paying to talk to you, you think people would do that? I rather give that money to and NGO. And even if there are people to pay you to talk, be rest assured that I would only pay you to shut up and if you don't one of my beamers would either take your head off (do you have one?) or just break your mouth so you wouldn't talk ever again! Don't show your face again.
Shoaib Akhtar
I know who you are, where you work, and what’s your real name. In fact I wanted to reach your office, come to your desk, and give you two tight slaps. I didn’t because I believe in love and not war, and also because I was glad that you didn’t have enough guts to put your real name. I presume that it is not you but real the Shoab Akhtar – Pakistan’s Rawalpindi Express. Hence, this mail is addressed to him and not you.
Shoaib, I am sure you remember how 16-year-old Sachin got out at zero in few of his initial matches, and in the next match he had to face ace bowler Abdul Qadir who had laughed at his potential. He in fact had provoked him to touch his ball if he can. And the end result was - 3 sixes in 3 consecutive deliveries.
I very well could have deleted your comment and rested in peace, but then I differ on two important things if compared to Jesus Christ. Neither do I forget and nor do I forgive.
Askenni.com was born just to prove a point, and here is a small beginning…a mail I got from one of my readers…
I have found your website on Internet. I have couple question I need to ask you. How can I make payment? I am not in India.
Thanks
Nilesh
Doesn’t it imply that my prediction about myself is coming true? And this is just a beginning…
In one way I should thank you for the comment, because it provoked me and provided me with enough motivation to create my OWN EMPIRE…and am not far from creating one soon.
I am not sure if your CLOSE FRIEND will forward this URL to you, or whether you will read this blog and leave another nasty comment. But the message is before passing a comment, do your homework properly and double check about the person whom you are playing with. Be ready for real slaps this time!
Agar tum Shoaib Akhtar, to hum Sachin Tendulkar!
Posted by Kenni at 07:00 AM | Comments (0)
July 21, 2004
The stunts wives play!
Love could be a bouquet of roses, but marriage is an altogether different game. It isn’t a bed or roses as wisely said, but it is a relationship where a man compromises on his ego, self-respect and ultimately loses his individuality just to save the relationship. There also seems to be misconception floating around the society that the wives are always better genre than the husbands, and that there is always a woman behind a successful man. It would be ideal if it is rephrased as – ‘women are always AFTER successful men, and not behind.’
The first three months of the marital life is always the best. Later, women start showing their true natural colours other than pink. Now the whole purpose of their existence happens just to tame the men, and enslave them. And if the man tries to be stubborn in changing, here are few stunts wives usually play to get their things done.
Stunt 1) Blackmail you of leaving to her parents’ place & never come back
How to handle it: Never ever make her feel that her presence is important for your happiness. Just make it very clear that, she is just an attachment, and if need be you can always detach and attach someone else. And also don’t ask her when she is coming back, and lastly don’t call her over the phone or pick the phone if she calls you.
Stunt 2) Will lock herself in a room & create panic
How to handle it: Men usually panic a lot if a woman shuts herself in a room when she is angry. The fear is – she might end up doing something nasty – to the extent of committing suicide. Don’t try to break open the door this will only make her feel good. Just open the main door, start your bike, and walk out of your house. You can come back after 2-3 hours – your dinner will be ready.
Stunt 3) Will try to use your desperation to her benefit
How to handle it: Any social system thinks that sex is important only for men and that women are born saints! Wives are completely aware about how important sex is for their better halves, and they always try to snatch this opportunity to get their things done. Most of their request petitions comes to fore in the bedroom, that too when the man is desperately seeking sex. It is always hard to say NO when a simple YES can get you a marathon session.
To avoid this, just make a rule that none of the partner will open their mouth to TALK once the light is put off!
Don’t ever think that your wife is always right, and that your partner is doing some kind of favour living with you. Remember she chose you because she didn’t get anyone better and this makes you unique and important. Also don’t try to be too nice just to save the relationship. Be honest, truthful and stick to dharma, and if she still want to leave…just let her go, you always have Bangkok to your rescue!
Posted by Kenni at 05:06 AM | Comments (3)
July 19, 2004
The rocket science behind Gambling!
I don’t want to comment on the Supreme Court’s judgement about whether Horse Racing is sports or a gamble played on mere luck. I might get arrested for defamation of court. But then according to my personal opinion, I don’t find anything sportive about horse racing. Instead I have seen families badly hit by loans & credits, and people who have ended up being a pauper after gambling their hard-earned money on these animals.
Before I start my blog on Gambling, here is a small news I wanted to share with you guys. I have started astrological consultation from home, and anyone who wants to have an insight into his/her future can mail me at kennedig@yahoo.com
My father in law is a hardcore gambler, and I always hated the way he saved the clipping from the last page of the Hindu (newspaper) that carried information about horses, jockeys and races. He has few colourful pens, which he uses to do some kind of study late night about which horse will win and which horses to bet on. He lives on the hope that he will win a jackpot someday, and will be able to build his own house and buy his own car. He is 60, and he has been gambling for some 30 years now. I am sure if he had saved the money he had put on horses, he at least would have built 2 houses by now.
Whenever I asked him about how exactly the betting is done, I could see a big smile on his face and he would love to talk about it for hours together. I always wanted him to stop it, but then I could not advice him until I know what exactly it was.
So we planned a day. We decided to go to the racing club one Sunday, and thought would gamble. I was accompanied by my father in law and two brothers in law..as if it was a big family fare. I never wanted to make money, but wanted to learn the whole system…
Here is what I learnt..
Homework
You can go through few newspapers and understand about the latest winners – both jockey and horse. You can do a complete study, and decide at home on which horse to going to bet on. You better don’t take advice from anyone at the race club, though most people will talk as if they have done a PhD in the subject. Go fully prepared. How much ever prepared you are the chance of you winning always remains 50/50!
Entry
You can get in by paying an entry fee of Rs 5 or Rs 25 or Rs 50. It naturally is based on the class of people whom you are going to be seen betting with. It varies from beggars to filmstars. I had an opportunity to see few beggars betting their HARD EARNED MONEY paying Rs 50 as entry fees!
Bookies
You are surrounded by bookies stall run mostly by Gujjus. You have two options, you can bet with these individuals or there are government run stalls, where the returns are less.
These bookies keep changing the percentage of amount that you would fetch after the race is over. For instance in any particular race there are few favourite horses, which have won few races before and whose probability of winning the race is quite high. The bookies will always quote the least amount for these horses. The rates go this way…
½ <
1
2.
.
.
. >20
So if you pay Rs 100 on a horse, and if its rate is quoted as ½ before the race, then you will get Rs 150 if your horse wins.
The maximum return is promised for horse that has never won any race.
The rates are not fixed it is different with each bookie and keeps changing every 10-15 seconds. I really didn’t understand on what basis they change it.
How to pay
The tax meter starts right from the beginning. If you bet Rs 100, the tax levied is 10 per cent, and you get a ticket for Rs 90. Again if you win the bet, you will be taxed again.
You can escape paying tax, but in this case there is a risk if you win HUGE amount of money.
How to bet
I had heard only about the concept of JACKPOT, before I myself went to the club. But there are many other ways you can bet, and still can lose money err gain money.
Winner
This is a direct method where you bet on a horse, and say it will come first. In most of the races, the favourites (as mentioned earlier) come first. This method is profitable only if the amount you going to bet is huge. For instance, if you bet Rs 100 on the horse and if you win the same you will make not more than 50 rupees profit. At the same time if you bet Rs 10,000, you will be making Rs 5000 in not more than 30 mns!
The risk is – you will never know which one of the favourites will come first, and also there is no rule that the favourites will always come first!
Place
The risk involved in this system is a bit less, and most people make impressive money playing ‘place.’ You need not bet on the winner, you just have to tell the order in which the horses will win.
For instance you can say Horse A will come 1st, Horse C will come 2nd and Horse B will come 3rd. You can bet on all the 3 possibilities and still walk out with zero loss.
Jackpot
It isn’t easy as it is claimed to be. In a day there are at least 10 races, and to crack the jackpot you should be in a position to tell the winners of all the 10 races without a single error. Moreover, the jackpot amount is distributed among all those who have given the right combination.
The chance of cracking a jackpot in my opinion is 1 in 100 million.
Who should play & who makes money?
Most people who gamble are the one’s who think gambling is a way of earning money. And whoever has thought that way has always led a miserable life. Horseracing isn’t for poor, thought 90 per cent of the people found in a racecourse belong to the middle class or people who are under the poverty line.
It is a sport for the rich, who can try their luck with few percentage of their income for the sake of excitement.
End of the day, the people who make money are the jockeys, the racecourse owners, and the horse owners like Vijay Malaya.
Fraudulent Activities
An astrologer or a psychic is always asked, when they know about the future why can’t they predict gambling results. To be honest it would be easy to predict the results, if everything remains transparent.
The whole set up works in such a way that end of the day the organizers don’t make any losses. The jockeys are ordered to lose the race deliberately, so that the money which was betted on the best favourite remains with race club.
The amount of frauds is less in bigger races like Derby, organized once a year by various race clubs, where the Cup or the title matters more than the money.
The amount I lost
I deliberately betted on the worse horse so that it doesn’t win, and also kept praying for the same. I didn’t go the race club to make money, but wanted to learn the rocket science behind it.
I remembered what Tamizh poet Thiru Valluvar had to say about gambling in his famous work Thirukural…
Winning a game at gambling can be compared to the fish that has just swallowed the worm attached to the fishhook, it is happy about worm but the truth is that it is entrapped for life!
I lost Rs 210…and I am glad I did!
Posted by Kenni at 05:25 AM | Comments (3)
July 13, 2004
Total detachment comes through total acceptance!
Most enlightened people advice on an interesting concept of taking your mind to a state where nothing external affects you. The whole of Zen philosophy is based on this technique of staying alert, conscious, and keeping your mind detached from all worldly pursuits. It might sound easy to read, preach and philosophize but in reality it is the most difficult thing to practice. Training your mind using your own conscience is like trying to lift your own body – you never know when you will succeed and when you will fall miserably.
Here is a story that made me realize what Zen actually meant…
There lived a Zen master who practiced total detachment. He had no money, no family, no wealth and not more than a pair of clothes. He also would keep changing his name so that he doesn’t get attached to his name!
He had few sincere disciples with whom he lived. Once they came across a river, which had to be crossed through a bridge. The bridge was so narrow that not more than one person could cross it at a particular time. A young lady was crossing the bridge with a pitcher in her hand, and she was having a tough time crossing it. Seeing her struggling the Zen master offered to help her by lifting her and letting her on the other side of the river, and she agreed. Once all crossed the river safely, the master started moving as if nothing happened.
One of the disciples was a bit confused about the whole philosophy of detachment now. He started doubting his master, his disciples and himself. His query was, if the Master practiced detachment then why should be bother to help that young woman? Why didn’t he let her go on her own? Why should he offer any help, when nothing external mattered?
It was afternoon already, and the group had to stop for lunch. After the lunch was over the Master asked if someone had any doubt or query; none responded. After a break they started moving again.
The question was killing the disciple from inside who still could not understand why the Master had to lift that lady on the first place.
The sun was setting, and the group stopped for a small break again. After taking some rest, the Master asked the group again if someone had any doubt or query. The disciple could not hold it any more. He had to ask it now, and he asked…Master, when you preach so much about total detachment, why did u help that woman to cross the bridge? Why did you lift that lady? And the master replied…I left the woman near the river itself, you still seem to carry her! That is what total detachment is all about. The group started moving again.
Total detachment doesn’t mean that you start ignoring the truth. It simply means that you start accepting things, while carving the impermanence factor deep down in your being.
In life
When at school…don’t ignore your studies you will be out one day
When at college…don’t ignore love interests it will fade someday
When at work…don’t ignore your work you will retire someday
In relationships
Don’t ignore your parents you will have to leave them someday
Don’t ignore your children they will leave you someday
Don’t ignore your friends they will be away from your someday
Don’t ignore your beloved, as he/she might not be there for you someday
Posted by Kenni at 06:22 AM | Comments (10)
June 19, 2004
Father, dear father!
June 15th was my dad’s birthday and I forgot to call him. I regret that I never belonged to the generation where fathers treat their children as friends. My father was always a terror, and we (my 2 elder sisters and me) hardly would speak to him. My mom was a mediator always, and everything would reach him through her - whether it’s about a new dress we want or it is about going on a school picnic.
I wasn’t close to my dad at all. To be honest, his presence at home always frightened me. It doesn’t mean I never wanted him, just that I wasn’t comfortable with him at all. He had a stern voice, and always expected discipline. I don’t remember a single instance when I refused to take his orders. One of the few things I did even when I hated them was to get him a pack of cigarette (Capstan filter when 5, and Wills filter when 17) at 7 AM on Sunday mornings.
I am 30 now, and am sure if I calculate I would have not interacted with him even for more than 10 hours or I should say 15 hours maximum. There was no verbal communication whatsoever and we existed on the basis of body language. That surely doesn’t mean there was nothing between. There indeed was an emotion attached to our relationship, which changed with time - I feared him when I was a kid, I hated him when I was in my adolescence, I respected him when I was 25, and I love him when I am 30.
The 10-hour conversation meant a lot to me. His advice, which made no sense when I was a kid, makes absolute sense when I myself am a father today.
Few things he told me that became a part of the philosophies I follow day in day out.
“Education is what I can give you, rest everything is your call.” And today it is the education he gave us, which is feeding me.
“If you copy or steal, do it in such a way that you never will get caught”. He got a sealed matchbox, and asked us to take out the sticks without breaking the seal. We failed. He pressed the matchbox from the sides, and the sticks fell out. His explanation was ‘none would bother to count the number sticks in a matchbox, and also if you take 5 sticks from 10 boxes, you already have created 1 matchbox.’
He always said, “Try to stick to the truth. If you lie, you have to tell some 1000 lies to justify the first one. So, better not to lie and complicate lives.”
“Never ask God for a fair & beautiful children, just ask for a normal kid. Being normal is the biggest blessing God can shower on you”. I am reminded of my father words each time my 2-year-old daughter runs to me to hug me after am back from my office.
“Respect elders and look after them when they are old. You never know how fast your life will go, and you will be old one day too”.
My parents today stay some 1000 kms away from me. He was busy man once upon a time, and my mom would remind him about our birthdays. Today he is retired, and never misses to give us a call on our birthdays. Their lives revolves around us and our phone calls make a lot of difference to their life. And I honestly wonder if I am justified for not giving him a call just because I was busy with my schedule?
Happy Fathers Day!
Posted by Kenni at 08:47 AM | Comments (5)
June 11, 2004
Venus attacks for the first time!
I am sorry if the headline is misleading. The blog has nothing to do with the recent Venus transit. It is about Venus - my dog who is 4 months old now.
From childhood, I don’t know why, I somehow loved animals more than human beings. I have had many animals right from white rat, dog, parrot, parakeet, fish, turtles, to rabbits, and hen. Probably I love them because they don’t manipulate, they don’t lie, they don’t indulge in backbiting and they don’t boss around. They make great companions and all they need is a small share from your food.
It was 1.30 am and I was fast asleep. My wife woke me up saying Venus has been barking for the last 15 minutes. I had read somewhere that you should never take animals signs for granted. They always try to communicate, and usually humans fail to notice it. It is said dogs and cats can even know natural calamities like earthquakes and storms well in advance.
I was a bit scared to go out. I don’t know what could it be - a thief, another dog or some kind of snake. It was pitch dark, and I rushed so that nothing happens to Venus if it is a snake. My area is kinda prone to snakes, as I always prefer to live in the woods – far from the maddening crowd.
I opened the door and I could see Venus all energetic. She rushed to me wagging its tail, and I asked her what’s wrong. She was silent for a while, and later lifted her head looking at the door top and started barking again. It was a terrified rat sitting on the doorframe!
To be honest rat and cockroaches scare me more than snakes. I rushed to the bedroom to call my wife – she is an expert in dealing with rats. Once it so happened that I locked myself in one of the rooms, and she managed killing a huge rat that was disturbing us for a while with a broomstick. She laughed at my bravery and I said well I hate killing animals.
I held Venus, and my wife made the rat run away. I patted Venus, gave her a biscuit and we went to sleep.
I trust Venus more now, and am glad I invested in him. Thanks to my colleague Nandu who impressed me with a beautiful advice - everyone should own at least one pet in life, it surely brings a whole lot changes in your life.
Posted by Kenni at 12:30 PM | Comments (0)
May 25, 2004
Depression – male menses!
The moods of human mind are seasonal and depression is like Chennai’s summer - it drains your energy completely and makes you feel yuck and tired both physically and mentally. These swings are also known as Male Menses - the only difference being men neither bleed nor they need the new winged Whisper to protect them.
All pass through this phase of depression, which stays for a minimum of 2 and maximum of 5 days, and there are no specific reasons for the same. It just happens, though few people have their own rationales.
How to know if your friend is depressed
Most people are highly irritable during this phase. They tend to argue on anything and everything you speak to them. Not that what they speak are their personal opinions; they just want an opportunity to prove a point and transfer the garbage they are carrying for a while. They usually succeed in doing so too. The best way is to cut the topic midway, and you can see them already fuming.
How to know whether you are depressed
Nothing in world could interest you. Not even Jennifer Lopez’s back, and am not exaggerating. You will feel as if the whole world was created by the God to make you feel disgusted, and that God is planning a conspiracy against you to put an end to you forever.
How to help your friend when he/she is depressed
A friend in need is a friend indeed, so goes the saying and there is no hard and fast rule that you should stick to it. Never become a dustbin for your friend to vomit his psychological garbage on you. Just ignore him, and he will be all right. There are few instances when depression leads to suicidal tendency. If your friend asks for help, please buy him a strip of sleeping pills.
No man who spoke about committing suicide has ever committed suicide. Even committing suicide is destined astrologically, and moreover it is a decision taken in an impulse.
I came across a news story long back on ‘World This Week’, about a book that was published in the US about ‘How to Commit Suicide.’ The book sold like hot cakes, but then none who bought the book dared to experiment.
How to help yourself when you are depressed
Stay aloof and stay alone, as there is nothing like self cure. Talk to yourself to find solution rather trying to escape it by talking to your friends. Friends can only listen to you, but the solution lies within you.
And never ever talk about your sick plight to your girlfriend and sob! You will surely miss all the minutest chances you ever had to marry her. Remember women need a shoulder to cry and not a nut who needs counseling every time!
Posted by Kenni at 06:46 AM | Comments (4)
May 19, 2004
Follow your inner light!
Mrs Sonia Gandhi has given one tight slap to the shameless BJP by just putting down the most desirable post of India - the post the Prime Minister. This is the same post most Indians want to reach in their political era, and this is the same post for which most political dramas, killings, and hypocrisy are undertaken. And we need to accept the fact that a person from Italy had to come down to India to educated us that it isn’t the post that matters but it is the values, principles and ideals that drive a nation. (I am sure if given a chance A B Vajpayee won’t mind being the PM even on his death bed!)
We salute your decision Mrs Sonia, and respect your inner call.
So what is this inner light or conscience that Sonia is talking about? My teacher told me about a scene from Kamal Hasan’s movie ‘Hey Ram’, where Gandhi when asked about India-Pakistan partition, says – ‘I cannot listen to everybody, I have to listen to my inner God’.
We all have an inner voice, but we tend to compromise on that in our lives out of fear, insecurity, force, ignorance, money, and by comparing ourselves to others.
Sachin Tendulkar flunked in his 12th grade from Jhun Jhun Wala College. He understood that he is not here to do his graduation/post-graduation and travel in a train everyday for a 9-5 job. He knew in a country like India not being a graduate is a big risk you would take. But he followed what his conscience had to say – follow your passion, fulfill your dream and become a cricketer. Rest is history.
Mother Teresa when young didn’t know what to do with her life. She prayed, and she got a divine guidance. She was asked to go to Calcutta, India, and she followed her inner voice. The first person she saw getting down from the train was a leper and at once she knew what she has to do next. Thus was born Missionaries of Charity.
Galileo said, the gravitational pull for all the objects remain the same no matter how heavy they are. He argued a 5 gm stone and a 1 ton stone will reach land at the same time when dropped from top of a building at the same time. People laughed at him. But he stuck to his conscience, but then as usual people even refused to see him proving his point.
Swami Vivekanand could have fallen in love with some woman, got married to her, reproduced children, got a govt job, retired at 58, and died by leaving some 1 lakh insurance amount and some 50 k as bank balance. He never did that. His inner call was to become the greatest SAINT of all time, and he made it. He left his body at the age of 32, but the work he has left behind will be revered for generation to come.
There are many such examples about people becoming successful just following what their conscience had to say.
So how do you find what your inner call is?
Just close your eyes, and do an instant check. Ask yourself why are you doing what you are doing? If it is out of fear, insecurity, force, ignorance, money, or by comparing yourselves with others then probably that is not the job you are supposed to do. Know the work that gives you the most satisfaction, it could be even stitching a shoe or just plain talking. That is the area you need to develop yourself in, and take my word success is assured!
Always remember follow your Inner light!
Posted by Kenni at 03:49 AM | Comments (8)