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August 30, 2009
I felt ‘fucking’ embarrassed!
These days I am spending good amount of time with Joseph, an Israeli biologist, who is setting up a fish farm in Chennai, which will start exporting ornamental fish soon. I usually don’t admire people. Not that because I don’t want to, but because I rarely meet people with high caliber. The last person I admired in my life was my teacher K Gopalakrishnan (http://www.sathyaprema.com). And almost after 7 years I am meeting someone who knows what he is doing – ‘perfectly’!
Joseph is a Jew. I have known Jews either through Bible or through Hitler, and have never met one or known one so far. Meeting with Joseph, I am sure, had a divine reason. I have read and heard that Jews are the most intelligent people in the world, and Joseph proves it with every thought and action of his.
While being part of the Corporate world for almost 8 years, I have interacted with Presidents, Vice Presidents, General Managers, Managers…and I have always felt there was something common in them. And the commonality factor was they were all mere ‘choots’. They were where they were not because of their intelligence but because God had been nice to them. You surely don’t need brains to climb the corporate ladder. And also you don’t need intelligence to make money or to be successful in life - our politicians are the best example to prove this truth.
Kolathur is a place in Chennai, where it is said some 600 families are into breeding ornamental fish. And they make a decent living out of it. Joseph had some business work there and I said I would love to accompany him. We were accompanied with another person, who supposedly has done his Doctorate in Ornamental fish from Chennai University. From the very look at him anyone can judge what the Indian educational system has done to him. Highly theoretical and zero practicality!
We went to a whole seller, who has been dealing with all aquarium related equipment for the last 3 decades. Joseph had a list of things he wanted to know about - along with their quality and also their prices. An interesting guy attended to us whose English wasn’t good and who had common answers to all the questions.
We enquired about 15 products and right from oxygen motors, tubes, controllers, to sponge and medicine and the attendant gave out the same answer – “this is cheap, Indian, bad quality. This is little but costly, Chinese, good quality.” And the quality difference was very much visible.
Every time he said, “this is cheap, Indian, bad quality” - it kept hitting me hard inside. What are we Indians doing? We can’t even make a simple plastic stuff with precision? And what are we boasting about ourselves to the world?
Later we went to meet few breeders. They are all illiterates. And considered to be poor, which I really doubt. They have occupied illegal lands, and every other house has huge cement tanks where they breed fish with the least cleanliness on mind. They are very clear in what they are doing. They prefer to breed only those fish, which are expensive, so that they work less and laze around rest of the time. And I am sure the government is in full support to them for vote factor obviously.
The question that crossed my mind was – why can’t educated people get into this business, and do things more professionally? And why has present education system made us mediocre, when illiterate people are minting money in the name of poverty?
Posted by Kenni at 02:26 PM | Comments (0)
August 27, 2009
Take care of your children!
Child abuse isn’t a new phenomenon. It was always there since human civilization. Just that these days the media tries to create a lot of noise when such event occurs. Of course people’s awareness towards the subject has increased, but the main reasons for it to occur on the first place are the parents themselves! I have noticed ‘nonsensical’ moms buying cloths for their children, just because the dress looks cute! This includes mini skirts, and see through which these moms probably were not allowed to wear when they were kids! The first rule is – when the kids grow let their dress grow too. And ‘moms’ – please try to see the world from a man’s eyes too before it is too late.
I met a female client recently, who had total aversion towards sexual life. She is married, but she could not understand why she carried this particular aversion. And the truth - she was molested when she was a child. I will deliberately explain the event as explicitly as possible, so that at least one person who reads this particular blog understands the seriousness and remains on the guard with respect to their children.
It isn’t true that only men get into sexual abuse and that only men are sexually deprived. Women are equally abusive and are equally deprived. The society is so lenient towards women in the name of equality with men that many a crime the women commit goes unseen forever. I watched an eye-opening documentary recently, which says – 33 per cent of the lesbian sexual acts are mere rapes - a point to be pondered upon for sure.
My client was just 4 years old when this event really took place. She used to be left alone at one of their ‘close’ relatives place to play in the evening. And this was a routine thing. The couple was childless, and my client now thinks they had sexually incompatibility too. The relative lady was 30 years old then. She would call the child in the kitchen, and undress completely, and cook completely nude. The child would just keep playing with the toys.
And one day the lady just walked close to the child and started rubbing her genitals on the child’s genitals. She kept doing it, and the child never understood what was going on. And she even asked the child to kiss her genitals! For the child it was yucky, and she refused.
I personally was a lot shocked to hear this from the client. And the only question I could ask my client was – why didn’t you tell your parents about this? And she said – I didn’t understand what was happening, and didn’t know what to tell them! True – how can a 4-year-old child interpret such an event? Just because your child doesn’t tell you things doesn’t mean ALL is well.
I have read stuff where it says – most child abuse happens in the family, and this kind of abuse can do a permanent damange to the kid's mind. It is not that you always have to remain paranoid, but then don’t take things easily either.
I am sure all need money, and all are in a hurry to prosper. But end of the day everyone knowingly or unknowingly are in the rat race to give a better life for their children. And if tomorrow we are held responsible for child’s unhappiness, then the whole rat race becomes a mere waste of time and effort.
When my children were born, we i.e., - my wife and me - had decided that wherever the kids go, one of us will always accompany them. And we try to stick to this rule. And secondly what they wear is decided by me and not by their mom.
I ran over a goat recently and the goat died instantly. I asked few questions to myself. Was I drunk? The answer was NO. Was I over-speeding? The answer was NO. Did my brakes fail? The answer was NO. Was I on the wrong lane or route? The answer was NO. Hence the death of the goat is not my headache. Jo hona hai so hoyega, which is true - but then see to it that your irresponsibility didn’t lead to such an event!
Posted by Kenni at 03:41 PM | Comments (0)
August 26, 2009
Mudhal Konal, Mutrum Konal!
For non-Tamizhs - the heading is a beautiful Tamizh saying, which essentially means – “if the first step is crooked, the end result is gonna be crooked too.”
Recently a good friend/client of mine asked me an interesting question. “Say there is a close friend of yours who consults you regularly, but pays you less. And there is another client (not a friend necessarily), who consults you too but then pays you more.” “Now on a particular day both of them need to consult you urgently at the same time – whom will you give preference to?”
Quite an interesting question, but then I never had to give any serious thoughts before answering it. The answer is simple. Friend or client – doesn’t really matter to me, they are one and the same. I said, “I will give preference to that person, who is sincere and also who respects astrology and astrologer more than the other person.”
A good astrologer isn’t someone who casts your chart first, then takes time to do the analysis, and at the end makes the prediction. A good astrologer is someone – who reads his client’s mind the very moment they meet or chat. One should clearly understand that every astrologer is dealing with people day in and day out, and they can very easily figure out what the other person is up to. It is a different story altogether about how the astrologer REACTS to a given situation, which usually depends upon the astrologer’s mood or his love towards the seeker’s sincerity.
Of course I cannot be picky about my clients who ask for my typed reports through other websites. They place an order I provide an answer and the relationship gets cut there. But then I am very picky about people who consult me through my site or consult me directly.
Like theHindi saying goes, “meine ye baal dhoop mein nahi pakaye.” Same way, being in this profession for almost 7 years now, I surely can judge people easily. If you think I am not being modest about it, then yes – I don’t want to be modest about it because I know what I am doing and I know what I am into.
Recently not happy with a client’s approach, I refused to do a reading for him. He kept insisting for almost 3 months. Well then I thought let me not be arrogant, and agreed to do his reading. The payment was done, and after 40 mns of chat, he had to rush to attend some personal problem, which isn’t my problem on the first place. I could have very well wrapped up the session. But then for courtesy sake I gave him another day/time for the remaining 20 mns of chat. And he would never turn up at the given time. Instead he will buzz me when he is free, and would never bother to ask whether I am free.
This prolonged for almost 1 month – like how a court session keeps going on and on. Finally I told him, “this chat cannot go forever, you have a choice to make now – either consider that the chat is over, or take back your money.” And he honestly said – charge for 40 mns chat, and return the money for the remaining 20 mns. Bloody I am not fucking running a grocery shop. I said, take all your money, and walk off. Good he accepted the offer. I surely regretted for not having listened to my instinct.
And this doesn’t stop with one person. These kinds of people are everywhere and I do meet them regularly. But the problem they don’t understand is - I understand their attitude immediately. So where is the fun in fooling who understands that he is getting fooled? May be instead of being brutal to people the astrologer is just being kind to you!
Posted by Kenni at 06:33 PM | Comments (0)
August 20, 2009
The more I know, the more I am unknown!
‘This particular blog is dedicated to my cousin (brother) P K Kumar and Mr Joseph Itzkovich (Israel).”
As I rewind my memories, I remember the day when my dad bought me my first fish tank. I was just 7 then and I was thankfully too young to clean it every week. My sisters managed the show, and I would just sit and watch the fish swimming. All that I was told was – buy some sand, have oxygen equipment, keep a filter, and leave some colorful fish. The tank was more of a showpiece and we never had any problems having it that way.
For pet lovers, who cannot keep dogs or cats for various reasons, fish tanks are a better bet. But then it becomes boring with time – because you cannot handle them or physically touch the fish. There are days, when I was so bored that I left the tank uncleaned for months together and you would need a torch to see whether the fish are still alive. (My clients who visited my house know that better ;))
Recently I met a client who is into exporting ornamental fish from India. More than her being excited about my profession, I was excited about her’s. She introduced me to her boss – Mr Joseph Itzkovish, who is setting up an export unit for ornamental fish in Chennai. He visited my home to check my fish tank, and give me suggestions. It was when I came to know what all I don’t know about a simple concept called a home aquarium.
Meanwhile I have been chatting with my brother and he enlightened me about a concept called ‘Aquascape’ – which essentially means to set up a small ecosystem in your fish tank. He said, better to discard artificial stuff in your tank, and go in for natural sand, natural rock, and also natural plants. I am sure life gets a lot tougher now but at the same time it becomes more challenging, and more fulfilling when compared to a plastic showpiece with few fish maintained by a third party.
My brother added that there are three kinds of fish. One that feeds on the top, one that feeds in the middle, and one that feeds at the bottom. You just need to maintain the balance, and buy fish accordingly and also buy fish depending upon the temperament of the fish. This will keep the show running automatically with minimal interference, he said.
I googled, contemplated, and kept thinking about how to know which fish feeds where. Most people who were into fish business for years never knew the answer either. This is when Mr Joseph Itzkovich’s answer hit me on head, which was so fucking obvious.
The answer indeed made me feel ashamed of all the biology and zoology I studied with zero practical experience in school and college. The answer is – the fish that has mouth on the top is the top feeder, the fish that has mouth in the middle is mid-feeder, and the fish that has mouth at the bottom is bottom feeder!
My hobby of course is getting more interesting now. And in the process there is a spiritual enlightenment too. A man’s brains gets so confused and conked off just to maintain a 1-metre ecosystem, imagine the Man behind the show who runs a perfectly balanced ecosystem called the planet Earth!
I surely will put a photograph of my ‘Aquascape,’ when I feel I have achieved a decent one. Till then let me collect some natural rocks, and natural plants and face some failures.
Posted by Kenni at 02:51 PM | Comments (0)
August 14, 2009
Are you 'proud' to be an Indian?
TV Channels are showing newly released movies. Corporate are using the tri-colour to push their businesses in the name of patriotism. Politicians are all ga ga about India’s development and its so-called bright future. Film stars, who prefer a holiday in Paris or Mauritius, are busy saying – how and why they feel proud to be an Indian. NRIs are all set to celebrate I-Day in a foreign land. And as the Supreme Court in recent time has given a go ahead to every Tom, Dick and Harry to hoist the national flag, I, with many others, have been called to attend a Flag Hoisting ceremony by an area president, for whom this could be the last alternative to prove his existence. Well I am not going to attend the function for a simple reason that I don’t feel proud to be an Indian!
Let us take the recent example. There is panic all around India about Swine Flu. 15 dead in Pune, and in Chennai there are only 2 hospitals that have quarantine facility to check and treat Swine Flu. And how did China, with whom (in recent time) we have stopped comparing ourselves, handled the situation.
The report says –
“If you thought India with 20 deaths of swine flu is panicking, consider how China with over 2,400 cases and no deaths is attacking the virus. Unlike any affected nation, and more aggressively than the administrations in Pune and Mumbai, China controversially quarantined a few thousand suspected swine flu cases -- including the mayor of New Orleans, USA, and his wife, in June.” (http://in.news.yahoo.com/32/20090814/1067/twl-what-china-did-to-fight-the-flu-pand.html)
So what went wrong in India? We surely have the money, and we surely the manpower. But still we are not in a situation to handle panic situations. Reason enough to say that our health system sucks big time.
Politicians are busy collecting taxes and cess, and spending crores of money in providing basic education to Indians. They also have the guts to claim that Indian education system is good. But then why do they send their children to study in a foreign university? If Indian education system is good, why do we walk chin up – when we get admission in the US or UK? Reason enough to say Indian education system sucks!
Study says 70 per cent of Indians are mal-nutritioned. And these days Indians have lesser life span than Americans or Europeans. I read somewhere that the best wheat produced in India is fed to the cows in the US! And today, we are just closing down agriculture and bothering more about investing in barren lands. So what is the end result? Agriculture suck big time too!
This following sentence isn’t mine. It was asked to me by one of my friends who is just 18-years- old. He asked me – why don’t we respect our politicians? Why don’t we respect the police department? Why don’t we respect our judiciary? And why don’t we respect the press? I was a bit clueless, and I asked myself - Is there any solid reason that they are respectable on the first place?
May be we are proud about our rich heritage and culture. But how long or for how many more years are we going to fool ourselves by those illusionary concepts? At the pace we are getting Westernized, I am sure we soon will say there is no difference between India and American culture. If Valmiki and Ved Vyaas were born in India today, they would surely prefer to immigrate to the US. In India, God knows how many people they will have to corrupt to release their works - Ramayana and Mahabharata respectively. And God knows, how many fundamentalist politicians they will have to corrupt to keep their mouth shut for the controversies it carries.
I can go on and on…but let me save something for my next Independence Day blog.
Happy Independence Day and God Bless All (Only God can save India)
Posted by Kenni at 04:14 PM | Comments (0)
Quick Gun Murugan - Zimbly Hillarious!
Hindi - promo
English - Promo
and killer dialogues...
Sher ke muh mein haath...
I will Teach You How to Behave
If you are lightning
Leave the ladies I say
Smoking is haanikarak to health
Posted by Kenni at 09:31 AM | Comments (0)
August 12, 2009
Swine Flu!
Kindly don’t apply any scientific logic. Just burn karpur (karpuram) and dhoop (sambrani) at home twice a day – morning and evening. If your children are allergic to smoke – even then don’t worry – wheezing can be cured anyways.
Some more sent to me by my friends...
Certain Home remedies recommended by Medical Practitioners - Preventive measures to develop the immune in your body to fight against H1NI flu
1) Inhale Clove Oil for one second everyday
2) Chew 1 Clove daily in the morning
3) Eat Raw Garlic, Onion, Ginger (1 to 5 gm) daily
4) Drink Hot Milk with 2 gm of Turmeric in the night to gain antibodies in your system
5) Consume Plenty of Vitamin C fruits - Lemon, Orange, Amla etc
6) Gargle every morning with hotwater mixed with salt
7) H1N1 flu can also be kept away by using common herbs states Vaidya Pravin Hirpara. One can boost immunity by making a decoction (ukala) of basil (tulsi) leaves, jaggery (gur) and dried ginger (sunth). Tulsi has anti-viral properties and improves body's resistance to diseases.
8) NIV has advised putting few drops of Eucalyptus Oil (Nilgiri Oil) on your handkerchief or mask as an effective preventive measure against Swine Flu
9) Yog Guru Baba Ramdev has claimed that Swine Flu can be cured through ancient practice - Yoga. The Yog guru has stated that doing "Pranayam" regularly will make the heart strong that can prevent the virus from entering the body. He has also stated that there is a plant named "Gilloi" which can be both, a preventive measure as well as cure for Swine Flu as it makes the respiratory and immune system strong.
10) Dr. BN Singh, director of Homeopathy, UP says, "Swine flu is an influenza like illness, where primary symptoms are very much similar to those of influenza. Thus one can take Influnenzium 200 as a preventive medicine. Three doses each after 10 minutes within 24 hours can develop an immunity against H1N1 virus".
God Bless All
Posted by Kenni at 06:06 AM | Comments (0)
August 05, 2009
Whom are we fooling?
Rakhi Sawant finally chose the best partner from the lot and also got engaged to him. Unlike few think, Svayamwar isn’t a new concept in India and it has not revolutionized anything – neither feminism nor women power. It has always been part of Indian civilization, where women chose their partners - based upon the power they possessed. Sita married Ram through Swayamwar, and if Ram had been unsuccessful in breaking that bow – Sita would have got married to someone else. Of course I am not comparing Sita with Rakhi Sawant!
Personally I always admired Rakhi Sawant. To be honest not every woman can be so successful and reach such heights in life just by showing their boobs, navel, and pushing their butts out. Successful people are ones who were at the right place at the right time. For Rakhi it was showing her assets at the right place to the right audience at the right time. Who cares about what she has inside her skull! For men what matters the most is whether she is good fuck - yes or no!
The rule is simple. If you show your cleavage in the family, you are believed to be a person of loose character. If you show your assets in your street, you are considered to be an extrovert. If you flaunt your flesh to a group of people, you are considered a whore. And when you decide to show off to the world – you are called a celebrity.
I remember a joke where a man had to decide whom to marry out of the 10 probable spouses. To help him select better he arranges for few competitions. Running, swimming, quizzing, cycling, parachuting, modeling, and finally decides to marry the woman with the biggest boobs!
Two things I never understood out of the whole progamme ‘Rakhi ka Swayamwar.’ Why did the programme run for so many episodes? I am sure for Rakhi it wasn’t about who loved her the most. I am sure some auto driver in the remotest part of India loves her more than anybody else in the world. Will she marry him just because he loves her? So finally it was about money, power and security, which the present Canadian businessman can provide.
And the second thing, which I failed to understand was – how can men with good erection and healthy balls agree to participate in these kinds of programs and decide to bring the pride of men clan as a whole? Why does someone want to commit to someone for life, when you can have them whenever you want by throwing some extra money!
Indian audience is happy about Rakhi’s decision, the channel is happy for the TRPs it bagged, Rakhi is also happy I guess, but then whom are we trying to fool in the whole process? Indian psyche?!
Posted by Kenni at 04:23 PM | Comments (0)