Your Friendly Philosopher & Guide

There are many movies that show a man and woman falling in love, and getting married amidst various problems. And the movie ends saying, ‘and they lived happily ever after.’ Very few movies are made on life after marriage. None highlights the problems any married couple would face after marriage, and how life can go through hell in the very first year of married life.

Any man thinks he will get all the sex he wants in his life through his wife - right from what is depicted in Kama Sutra to what Jenna Jameson does in her porn movies. The first jolt is after marriage most women become aversive to sex and start having headaches most of the time. They think spreading their legs is the biggest favor they do for their husbands! And the moral is - sex life sucks after marriage.

The second jolt is about relationships. Wives have natural allergies towards their mother in law and sister in law. In the initial few months, they will mingle as if they were past life soul mates. They will shop together, they will watch movies together & even cook together. And with time (2-3 days) they start bitching about each other. They have verbal fights, and that is it about the relationship. Now men get tossed between two important people in his life – mother or wife. Man looks out for another house, and starts a new life with his wife – and that is not the end of the problem.

‘You should not meet your friends without my knowledge, you should give me all the accounts of money earned and spent, you should not reach home late, you should not have beers, you should not pick up or drop any of your girl colleagues at home, and no girl should call you over the phone.’ These are few conditions laid down by the wife for a husband. If he does any of the above, the best escape is to lie and move ahead in life. If he is honest and tells everything to his wife – then verbal fights and starvation cannot be ruled out. No food & no sex for few days – that is the punishment.

In the meantime there are other nataks too. When the fights reach new heights the wife packs her bags and moves to her parents house. And her jobless parents are more than happy to support her. They plan a conspiracy now - about how to get this man to their doorsteps and make him apologize in front of their girl! They forget that marriage is a mutual relationship and both need each other equally.

Women always think that men need women more than they need men. I personally think that unmarried men can any day have a better life than unmarried women. In the whole business deal of marriage – men face severe jolts from all the angles, and it is the women who move away with the limelight. May be because men don’t cry at their fate and women are just adept at dropping tears!